Adrenaline Adoration
by Crystal Renee
Summary: An arranged marriage tears Kenshin and Kaoru apart. Kenshin goes to find the woman he loves and unexpectedly finds her scarred in ways that make his blood boil. Can he bring Kaoru back to normal?
1. Foreshadowing Fate

**Disclaimer:** Now. Answer me this. Why would we need to come up with a great master plan to overtake the anime industry if we owned Kenshin? I thought so.

**Author's Notes:** This chapter was written by me, Crystal Renee, completely. The story started out as a collaboration with Lady Himura (somehow I lost contact with her). I'm going through and edigint and making everything pretty for you all to see. No more extreme rants in author's notes.

**Adrenaline Adoration **

_**Chapter 1- Foreshadowing Fate**_

Relaxing in the bath, Kaoru sank into the warm water until the ripples she made tickled her chin. Sighing, she opened her eyes and stared at the wall in front of her. Something had kept her jumpy all day, but she wasn't sure of what it was. It seemed to just be some unnerving feeling that wouldn't let go of her sanity. She shook her head to dismiss it; it was probably nothing, anyway.

For now she should enjoy the bath Kenshin had prepared for her. Kaoru blushed. Ever since he had first begun staying with her, he had always prepared the baths for her. It was some sort of unwritten rule in their lives; Kenshin prepared the baths, and Kaoru sat in there blushing while she thought of him. The reality was he was always sitting right outside the building, and he would jump in there if he had to.

That thought only brought a deeper blush to her cheeks, and she let her thoughts wander as she sunk into the water up past her lips, but not quite reaching her nose. Was that why he did this for her, constantly preparing her baths? To protect her? To be sure he knew where she was and that she didn't scald herself in hot water? Did he think she was going to cook herself?

Kaoru shot up quickly, slightly angered and then calming down. Of course Kenshin didn't think she'd do that!

"Kaoru-dono?"

She shot rim rod straight just as she was relaxing again, since she hadn't expected to hear the familiar voice. "Yes Kenshin?"

"Is everything all right?" he questioned her, worry tingeing his voice so slightly it was unnoticeable.

Well, unnoticeable to anyone who hadn't lived with Kenshin for as long as she had.

"Hai." She responded, trying to ease his worries over nothing. "It's wonderful."

"No. I meant are you all right? You've been on guard all day, that you have." He explained. "Is there a threat you haven't told me about, or is it something that's been bothering you?"

_'Kenshin baka!' _Kaoru thought, hoping he'd dismiss the subject after she answered him. _'Don't worry about me so much! Don't worry so much for that matter.'_

"It's nothing, Kenshin, so don't worry, okay?"

She heard a sigh and could picture the stress on Kenshin's face since she refused to give him a clear answer.

"I can't help that, Kaoru-dono, that I can't."

Kaoru groaned. "Kenshin, you do realize that you worry too much and it's not good for your health or your mind? You're going to give yourself wrinkles from all the stress you insist on putting yourself under."

"Are you saying that I look old?" Kenshin asked, humor in his voice. "I don't believe I look old, that I don't."

"Kenshin baka! If I was out there I'd smack you over the head!" Kaoru shot back at him. "You don't even look as old as you really are now; you look so much younger it's not funny! I think I'm starting to believe Misao. Is the Hiten Mitsurugi some fountain of youth thing?"

"Oro..."

Kaoru giggled.

"But tell me what's been bothering you, please Kaoru-dono." Kenshin stated. "It'll help you to tell someone."

"You should practice what you preach, Kenshin." Kaoru shot back. "I don't see you telling anyone what's bothering you, and I know that you're constantly..."

"Sessha should not burden you with his problems, Kaoru-dono, that he should not." Kenshin interrupted her.

Kaoru fisted her hands in the water. She had finally got him to quit saying sessha, and she'd been working on the whole -dono suffix, but he was so stubborn sometimes it was frustrating. Finally calming down, she responded.

"Kenshin, you know I'm not going to judge you. You can't expect people to trust you and tell you their problems if you can't share your own."

She could see him now, leaning back with a grin on his face and his hand behind his head in a nervous manner. "Sessha is not good with people, that he isn't!"

Fuming, Kaoru resisted the urge to grab her towel and go out there and pummel him to the ground. "Kenshin, what have I told you about calling yourself Sessha? Stop belittling yourself. Anyone who worries so much, does so much work and is so kind to everyone he meets is defiantly not a sessha."

"I'll try to remember your words, Kaoru-dono." He assured her. "But still, I do think you need to tell me what's bothering you. If it's a threat, I need to know so I can protect you."

She grinned at his care, and then shook her head. "You can't protect me from something I just feel, Kenshin. It's just been this feeling I've had all day, like something was going to happen and it was going to be a drastic thing."

"So I'm not the only one who's been having that feeling..." she heard him mutter to himself.

"You too Kenshin?" she questioned, quirking up in the bath. "It is something bad, do you think?"

There was a long pause before he responded. "I'm not sure, that I'm not. All I can say is to be safe; we should all be ready for anything, that we should."

Standing and wrapping her towel around herself, Kaoru stepped out of the bath and dried herself off. "Where did Yahiko disappear off to after practice, do you know?"

"I believe he went to the Akabeko to help Tae-dono and see Tsubame-chan, that he did." Kenshin answered. "And I'm pretty sure Sanosuke's having his hand checked again by Megumi-dono. He got in a fight last night and thinks he broke a few of his bones in the process."

She donned her yukata and tied it quickly, pulling her hair up to keep it from soaking the back of the flimsy material so much that it would cling to her. Stepping into her sandals, she opened the door and stepped out, nearly tripping on the step as she did. Why wasn't she paying attention to anything today?

"Sano should know better. He knows his hand isn't fully healed and he shouldn't be using it yet, especially with that Futae-no-kiwami." She answered, turning the bend to see Kenshin putting the fire out for her. "So it's just you and me tonight, huh?"

"All night I'm afraid, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin responded, looking at her. "Yahiko said he was going to stay with Tae-dono tonight so he wouldn't have to wake as early when he went to help in the morning. Seems she is holding a big party there and needs all the help she can get. And Sano promised me that tonight he'd be good and stay away from the gambling house and just go back to his place."

Kaoru looked at him quizzically. "And what's the reason for that?"

"Well, I'm afraid you don't realize that Sanosuke has been gambling off things from the dojo lately and I've had to get on his case. He tried gambling off Yahiko and my sword last night." Kenshin answered. "That's why I was gone this morning; I had to win my sword back."

"What about Yahiko?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Sano actually won that bet, that he did."

Rubbing the bridge of her nose, Kaoru sighed. "I'm going to have to give that freeloader a piece of my mind when he comes around tomorrow. You know he will be here by lunch, or at least dinner."

Kenshin had to agree with her there. Sano was bound to come by the next day for food, but none of them truly minded. Sano was a loyal friend, even if he did do stupid things sometimes just for the chance of winning a bet.

"Would you like me to clean the bathhouse or prepare dinner first, Kaoru-dono?"

"You do too much around here, Kenshin. Besides, Tae has been giving me cooking lessons... so do you think I could do the cooking tonight?" she pleaded with him. "I'll try and make something edible, I swear Kenshin!"

With that look, Kenshin found it hard to refuse her simple request. Besides, her food was edible... Sanosuke and Yahiko just exaggerated to get on her nerves. And unfortunately, they succeeded at that task, every single time.

"Of course Kaoru-dono."

She jumped up and squealed, giving Kenshin a quick hug before she ran back toward her room to change into a kimono. Kenshin spun around with the force of which she had used to leave and let go of him all at once, and finally regained his balance before turning his head toward the bathhouse.

_'I wonder what this...thing is. Is this a warning of something to come? Maybe I should keep a better look on Kaoru tonight, that I should.'_ He thought to himself.

* * *

Kaoru bit her lip and scrunched her eyes up in concentration. Something was missing; she could tell that much by the way everything was boiling. There was something missing, and it was important. But what was it?

It hit her like a ton of bricks. Rushing to the door, her sandals clacking roughly with the wooden floors, she threw the shoji open. She had to be fast, or else her food would burn. And on her first night alone with Kenshin in what seemed like eternity, she wasn't going to let little mistakes like that ruin it. She'd been so preoccupied with her other thoughts and worries that she had completely forgotten this key ingredient.

She went to rush out, and found herself smacking into the chest of a very shocked rurouni, who's eyes were narrowed in concentration and then wide with shock. Kaoru stumbled backwards and gripped the side of the door tightly to break her fall, while Kenshin stumbled backwards, trying to hold a container in his hands without letting its precious contents tumble out. Miraculously he managed to regain his balance without spilling the simplistic treasure. His scowl came back to his face as he looked at her.

"What's wrong Kenshin?" Kaoru questioned, noting something had to be bothering him. He didn't give that particular scowl for no reason--- that death glare was reserved for only the most dangerous situations, most of which involved her, she realized with a blush.

Kenshin straightened and softened his serious composure somewhat. "I heard you shriek, Kaoru-dono, that I did. I was worried, plus I was on my way out here with the tofu, that I was."

"Kenshin no baka." She muttered, walking up to him and gently taking the tofu from his hands. "I didn't realize I had shrieked. I just realized I had forgotten the tofu and hoped to get it before my dinner..."

She didn't need to finish her sentence. Kenshin was already rushing into the kitchen to rescue and salvage what was to be left of their now inedible dinner. Kaoru let the tofu fall from her hands as she looked at the ground. Even after all this time with Kenshin, she still couldn't manage to even cook him a decent meal without it turning to a catastrophe. Most would just laugh the matter off, but to Kaoru it was something much more complex. Amongst the shouts of 'oro' that resounded from the room, she was positive Kenshin had already began planning to make a new meal. She hated depending on him that much.

All Kaoru wanted to do was cry.

If she wanted to think about it, her achievements could be counted on one hand, if even that. She bit back the urge to wail and instead found herself bolting off to her room to sit. To be alone and think about why she was so out of it that day. Something was bothering her, like an itch in the spot that you just couldn't reach. Except, this particular itch was underneath the skin, and it infested her entire body.

* * *

"Kaoru-dono, I'm going to start--- Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin questioned with a perplexed expression as he walked out of the kitchen. "Where'd she go?"

His better judgment screamed at him to go find her, to see what happened. But something made Kenshin remained rooted to the ground in front of the kitchen, looking toward the bedrooms of the Kamiya dojo. Fighting internally over if he should cook a new dinner or go find her was an oddly difficult decision. He didn't know which would be better at the moment.

Kenshin began to rub the back of neck subconsciously, as it was a habit. Had she been upset because of the ruined food? He hadn't found it such a bad thing, and ultimately the damage done to their meal hadn't been as bad as usual. The problem was that women were such confusing figures at times. When they were upset they wanted to be consoled, yet, they would bite your head off. Kenshin winced at the image his mind displayed for him. It wasn't pretty, and to put it cleanly, quite gory.

He snapped his fingers. He remembered something he had completely forgotten about. His mind had been completely directed at the strange feeling that had settled its self to rest in his gut, and most of the day had been going on at a whim. Unable to place his finger upon the problem, Kenshin had originally dismissed it. But when Kaoru had mentioned she had been feeling the same thing all day, and that had been her reason for her sudden jumpiness, he had been forced to think about it again. Maybe that was why the minor disaster in the kitchen had bothered her, if that was the case.

With a new found resolve, Kenshin found himself leaning his ear against Kaoru's shoji door. He couldn't hear any sobs from the room, but her ki clearly told him everything he needed to know. She was distressed. The drop in her attitude was a striking difference and it scared him. She was usually so lively.

His eyes narrowed. What if this foe he was facing now was an invisible one, aimed directly at Kaoru? He couldn't do anything for her if it was. He was already closer to her than he had originally resolved to be. That's what hurt the most, Kenshin decided. Usually, he'd have to be careful about what he did when she was upset, and he knew she expected more from him now. They'd been friends for almost a year and half, and yet he still had his boundaries. In the whole time he had known her, she had only had a few episodes like this one. And even then, he wasn't there for her. A wince befell his face. Those had been his fault, too.

Deciding finally that he couldn't wait around for someone else to talk to her like he normally would, Kenshin left to his room to retrieve the few things he would need.

* * *

"Kaoru-dono?"

Kaoru lifted her head. It felt like a weight but she ignored it. "Yes Kenshin?" she winced. Her fake cheeriness hadn't been very convincing and she realized that.

"Please excuse Sessha, but could sessha please come in?"

She closed her fingers into tight fists and then clenched her teeth. He was feeling guilty about asking to come check on her. Why? She had already gotten on his case that day for saying sessha, and now wasn't the time she needed to deal with his guilt.

"Kenshin, don't belittle yourself. And yes, you can come in. Don't be so shy to ask." Kaoru said. She blushed momentarily, realizing she had just given him full permission to enter her room at will.

Staying in her position of leaning against the wall with her knees drawn to her chin, and the yukata she had changed into somewhat revealing more than it should, she continued looking with unfocused eyes at the wall in front of her. She could hear Kenshin open the door, and then shut it. She could feel how hesitant he was to be in here, and it obviously didn't help that it was just them in the dojo that night. She blinked a few times as she saw his chest directly in front of her face.

"Here Kaoru-dono." He said, handing her over a plate. "I remembered I had bought this cake. I hope it makes you feel better."

Hesitantly she drew her eyes up and away from her line drive vision of his chest and stopped at the plate Kenshin was holding. She did love cake, and she had to admit that she wasn't allowed to eat it that often because of the lack of money around the dojo. It was hard to feed four people when the only pay they received was from the odd jobs thrown to Kenshin from the police department, Yahiko's limited pay from his extra work at the Akabeko, Kaoru's money from training at other dojos, and on extremely rare occasions, money Sano won at gambling. The problem was, the poor guy got so excited that he won that he'd splurge and lose it all again before he could do anything with it.

If she didn't accept it, she knew Kenshin would only worry more. She could feel her arms shake as she lifted her hand up to take the plate, and immediately hated herself for it. Kenshin would start to wonder. And her assumption couldn't have been anymore correct.

With a burst of unexpected boldness, Kenshin had wrapped his hand around hers to steady the plate.

"You're cold."

She shook her head. "No."

Kenshin gave her a soft look before he removed the plate of cake from her hands and held her hands palm up so she could see what he was doing. "You're hands are cold, Kaoru-dono. You're cold."

"I'm fine..."

He folded her hands shut and attempted to warm them within his own, his full concentration positioned on getting the chill out of her body. She didn't say anything as she watched him rub the warmth back into the frigid, useless, calloused hands of hers. She blinked again, but this time to hide her tears. Calloused hands. They were a testament to her pride in her swordsmanship; yet, soft hands signified a graceful woman. She could not attest to such a title now. Sometimes, that upset her.

"Don't worry about dinner, Kaoru-dono." She heard him say. "I'm not upset."

She bit her lip. "You weren't expecting anything from me, were you?"

The way she had said it bit at him, and he stop his attempt at warming her hands. They had been warmed a while back, but he couldn't bring himself to stop. It seemed to be calming her, and that was what he had wanted. But even as he refrained from the warming process, he let her hands remain in his grasp.

"It's not that, Kaoru-dono." He stated, gently setting his elbows upon her knees to try and draw them down and put her in a more comfortable position of her legs crossing over each other as she sat. After doing that, he himself did the same thing, and he dropped their hands onto her lap. "I understand you're mind wasn't on the cooking. It was on something different, like mine has been."

She let her gaze drop to their joined hands on her lap, and Kaoru was far past taking the time to blush anymore. She could only nod.

"Is something else bothering you?" Kenshin questioned, craning his neck to the side in an attempt to get a better look at her. _'Come on Kaoru, what aren't you telling me? Why aren't you telling me? Do you really feel like you have to keep this side of you locked away?'_

She looked at him, trying to force the smile that she always had for him. Megumi had told her it was the best medicine for Kenshin, and right now she could think of nothing more to do to ease his sudden fears. Kenshin shook his head.

"No. You told me I didn't have to pretend to be happy when I was around you, so why can't you do the same with me, Kaoru-dono? When you do that, you only worry me more, that you do. And if what you said earlier was true, then I will grow wrinkles right here and now." He said.

Kaoru quirked a strange, somewhat amused grin. "I see one right there." She said, lifting her hand out of his and pointing right above his eyebrow. "I think it's a big, deep one too."

Kenshin's hand that wasn't still holding her other one flew to his forehead. "Oh dear. You don't suppose that Megumi-dono would have something I could use to get rid of this, do you? I don't wish to look old, that I don't."

"I think you'd look young even with gray hair and wrinkles, Kenshin." She said, trying to suppress the giggles that threatened to spill. "And I think that you have a gray hair, too."

Kenshin's eyes widened before a smile filled out his face. "Seems that I've worried so much I've gone past wrinkles and straight to gray hair."

She smiled at him. "How about that cake, Kenshin?"

* * *

Author's Notes: Well... that's chapter one. Hope you enjoyed.

3-

Crystal Renee


	2. Catastrophic Callings

**Author's Notes**: I started this chapter. Lady Himura wrote the body, and I went through and revised and then I posted.

**Adrenaline Adoration**

**_Chapter 2- Catastrophic Callings_**

A wind blew by, slowly ruffling Kenshin's hair. He urged his eyes to open, and after a few blinks discovered himself sitting outside of Kaoru's room, her shoji door still open from his departure from it the night before. Kenshin gripped his sword before he leaned forward, craning his neck to get a good look in the room. She hadn't moved from the position she had fallen asleep in that night. Kaoru's breathing came in even time, relieving the worry of anything that could have happened to her in the night.

Kenshin turned and leaned his head against the wall, his eyes blinking to adjust to the low light that filled the dojo as he stared absently toward the ceiling. He glanced over to Kaoru, the morning sun light shining upon her in all the right places. Her soft skin blended with the light, and Kenshin found it hard to resist caressing her beautiful face... beautiful face?Where did that come from? Kenshin mentally kicked himself at his own thoughts. But how could he help it? There she was, the only women who had never judged him for what he had been, but for what he was now. Sure, she's a bad cook, has a small temper and could act a bit childish sometimes, but Kenshin couldn't help but love her. Kenshin frowned, and his gaze faded from Kaoru to the floor.

_'She will find someone better, someone who will love her as much as I do.'_ Kenshin thought to himself, closing the door behind him, and in the process, closing the door to hope, a life, and a second chance at love.

Kenshin walked to the kitchen, ready to prepare breakfast, and upon looking around, he discovered they were out of rice.

"I had better got get some rice before everyone wakes up, that I should." Kenshin stated, nearly inaudibly, as he grabbed his reverse blade sword. He never dared to leave without it. He had just slid the door shut when Sano came running past him and into the kitchen. Even though he new he'd never make it away before Sano said anything, Kenshin made his first step.

"Kenshin!"

"Yes Sano?" Kenshin asked, poking his two forefingers together nervously and waiting for the lecture.

"Where's breakfast?" Sano shouted while looking at the empty table, which he looked over at least ten times in hope that food would magically find its way there.

"But Sano, I have to get rice first." Kenshin said, trying to sneak away from the wrath of his hungry friend.

"You said rice! So I come a running! And now your telling me there is no food?" he bellowed, unable to believe what he was hearing.

He swore that sometimes Kenshin went on sprees as the Battousai and ate all the food before he could get his hands on any. He mentally reminded himself to teach Kenshin a lesson. That was, after he had some food in his belly. Kenshin still needed to be breathing in order for that to occur. But afterward, then he would give his good friend the friendly lesson he deserved.

"Sano, calm down, I'll be back before noon." Kenshin said as he walked the path to the dojo gate.

"Noon? Kenshin I'll starve by then! And what about Yahiko? Think of the children, Kenshin!" Sano yelled, watching helplessly as Kenshin closed the gate.

Kenshin couldn't help but laugh at his friend's sad attempt to get a quick meal. No sooner had Kenshin left, that Kaoru had woken up from Sano's unnecessary screaming. She walked into the kitchen to see Sano flopped over the table, mumbling a strange mantra that sounded a lot like 'food...food...food' as he twitched.

"Good morning Sano?" Kaoru asked as she sat down at the table and Sano sat up right again.

"Good morning Jou-chan..." Sano pouted.

"We're out of rice again, aren't we?" she asked, patting her friends back sympathetically at the traumatized look that spread over his face.

"Yup…"

"Out of rice! How can this be?" Yahiko yelled, running into the room and ransacking the place in hopes it was all a joke.

"You guys act as if you haven't eaten in days!" Kaoru proclaimed her hands on her hips. "I swear, all you two do is eat."

Both Yahiko and Sanosuke stared at her.

"Well if it's your cooking, you can't really consider that eating..." Yahiko mumbled without thinking.

As if by reflex, Yahiko covered his head with his hands, knowing a bokken would be whacking his poor, abused skull before he could say he was sorry. Yahiko opened his eyes, noticing nothing happened. And as suspicious as that was, he let his hands fall from his death grip upon his cranium, oddly relieved to not see Kaoru cowering anywhere.

"Phew..." Yahiko sighed.

Before he knew it, a resounding 'whack' echoed throughout the room, signalling his mission to protect his head was a failure.

"Ouch! Geez busu that hurt! What, do you have a death swing or something?" Yahiko said as he jumped up and down, rubbing his head as Kaoru smiled in triumph.

"When will Kenshin be back?" Kaoru asked sitting back down next to a squirming Yahiko.

"He said before noon... I hope he was kidding... Jou-chan! Tell me he was kidding, please!" Sano stated, hunching over. Kaoru shook her head and rubbed her poor friend's back in reassurance.

As if the timing was perfect, there was a loud rapping upon the door.

"Kenshin's back! And with food!" Yahiko and Sano yelled in unison as they ran past Kaoru to the door. They threw open the door and pounced the person on the other side, not even bothering to see who it was.

Kaoru never got a chance to warn them that if it was Kenshin, he wouldn't have knocked. She decided it was fair punishment to let them be embarrassed once in a while. With all the times they had sat there and embarrassed her, why not give them a taste of their own medicine?

"Kenshin what did you bring-- huh? Dr. Gensai? What did you do with Kenshin?" Sano inquired, looking around for the rurouni who was sure to have his breakfast. "I need my food!"

"It's nice to see you too Sanosuke...I think..." Dr. Gensai said as Yahiko and Sano helped him up off of the ground.

Stepping outside to greet the old man, Kaoru instigated conversation with a usual question."Dr. Gensai, what brings you here at this time of the morning?"

Dr. Gensai's face was full of concern and Kaoru began to worry.

"Is something wrong?"

"We need to talk." he responded, Sano and Yahiko right on his tail as he walked toward her.

"Alone..." he added, looking at Sano and Yahiko with an expression that told them that was not going to be questioned or infringed.

"About what?"

"Your parents."

* * *

Kenshin walked down the busy streets, hurrying along so his "starving" friend would be happy, and his indefinite punishment for not being prepared lessened. If he could stuff Sanosuke full of delicious food before he attacked, then maybe he could avoid the oncoming scuffle.

"Good morning Himura! What can I get you today?" asked the man at the market, a cheery smile upon his face.

"A bag of rice would be fine. Oh! And a pound of tofu too please." Kenshin responded just as lightheartedly, enjoying the freedom of being treated as a man and not the manslayer he once was.

Kenshin was about to be handed his rice and tofu when he heard someone scream. It was high pitched, echoing throughout the crowded marketplace and making it easy to pinpoint. The person who had shrieked was behind him to the left, and most likely was a young girl in her teens by the sounds of her vocal cords.

"Thief! Stop him!"

Before Kenshin could turn around and stop the thief, he heard a loud crash as a man collided with the cart next to him. Sending his gaze around, he looked around to see if he could find anyone running from the scene. Nothing. As the dust cleared, as tall man stood there holding a purse and another man lay unconscious in the rubble.

"Did you see that? He moved so fast I didn't even catch him grabbing the thief and throwing him into that cart! He's amazing." Said someone to Kenshin's left. Imminent commotion began to invade the small space that was now allotted in the marketplace, and the multitude of voices made it hard for Kenshin to comprehend what was happening around him.

"Here you go miss." the man said, handing a young woman her purse.

He was a tall man, possibly a little taller then Sanosuke. In Kenshin's book, Sano was a monster at six foot two. The mysterious man had deep blue eyes and jet black hair, he was well built and obviously strong. Kenshin couldn't help but feel something strange about the so called "do gooder." Most people were not built for attack... and they definently were not capable of such quick movements.

"Ken-san!"

Kenshin turned to the familiar voice of Megumi running up to him.

"Ken-san did you see that? He sent that thief flying in one blow!" Megumi remarked, excited from all the action. "It was amazing, don't you agree?"

Kenshin didn't say anything to her of the subject, and he payed the man for his groceries before looking over at the man everyone was talking about. As if knowing Kenshin's eyes were upon him, he turned around and walked over to Kenshin, putting out his hand in a gentlemanly manner. The smile upon his lips looked forced, but Kenshin mentioned nothing of his observations, just let up the usual rurouni facade.

"I'm Kiyo. Kiyo Nishawagi." Kiyo said.

"Kenshin Himura. I've never seen you around here before, first time in Tokyo?" Kenshin questioned with a friendly voice, placing the groceries on the ground to shake his hand.

Kenshin felt even more uneasy once he grasped his hand. There was definitely something about this guy and Kenshin didn't like it, but what could it be? He seemed harmless enough, but yet again, looks can be deceiving. Kenshin was once Hitokiri Battousai, killing because he could. But could you tell now if you stared at the fuchsia wearing rurouni that was buying groceries and did laundry?

Kiyo let go of Kenshin's hand and replied, "I wish to forget about where I have been. My past is not important, all that matters is that I am where I am today. And who is this lovely lady?" Kiyo asked, kissing Megumi's hand.

Megumi blushed. "Megumi Takani, but Megumi would be just fine." she said, turning redder.

"Nice to meet you Megumi. I must be off, maybe we'll see each other again some other time." Kiyo said as he turned the other way and began to walk.

Kenshin watched him as he disappeared into the distance. He couldn't shrug off the feeling that there was definitely something not right about Kiyo. His aura was not like that of any other businessman or civilian he had met; he had the aura of a sheltered warrior.

'It will probably be the last time I see him again. Don't worry yourself. You may start getting wrinkles just like Kaoru-dono said,' Kenshin thought to himself as he picked up the groceries.

* * *

"My parents?" Kaoru asked as she shut the door behind them.

"Sit down Kaoru; this may take a minute or two." Dr. Gensai whispered.

She sat down, looking intently at Dr. Gensai, wanting to know what the matter was. The grim expression on his face was a far cry from the normally optimistic one he would carry around her. He had been her pedestal in life for so long since her parents passed away, and seeing him like this was strange and unnerving.

"It hadn't occurred to me until you turned eighteen last week... I had been going through my books and letters when I found... I found your father's will." Dr. Gensai said, unfolding a piece of old paper, faded and wrinkled from years of being kept hidden from sight.

Kaoru's eyes grew wide as Dr. Gensai held the paper in front of his eyes and began to read.

"Dr. Gensai, you are like Kaoru-chan's grandfather. If anything were to happen to both of us, we leave it to you to make Kaoru happy. We want her to be protected and taken care of even when we won't be there do so ourselves. On her eighteenth birthday, you are to find her a suitor if she has not found one herself. As our last wish, we ask this of you, our dearest friend."

Kaoru began to cry as Dr. Gensai finished reading the final words of her father and mother. Dr. Gensai couldn't help but cry himself; it had been so long since his last reminscence of the Kamiya family.

"What--!"Yahiko was cut off by Sano's hand being thrown over his mouth.

Apparently they couldn't help their curious little minds so they sat outside the paper thin doors listening in on the conversation. Years of experience told them both that if they wanted to have blackmail and any kind of gossip, eavesdropping was the best way to get it. The method had yet to fail for them.

"Yahiko, do you want to give us away?" Sano whispered angrily as he let go of Yahiko's mouth.

"Did you hear what Dr. Gensai said? Did you? Are you deaf? She can't marry someone else other than Kenshin! She can't!" Yahiko rapidly whispered. "And you know…"

"Slow down Yahiko! Didn't you hear what else he said? If she already found someone, then Dr. Gensai doesn't have to find her one!" Sano responding, knowing Kaoru loved Kenshin and wouldn't love another in a million years.

They hushed up as Dr. Gensai began to talk again. They had to know everything before they stopped talking. If they didn't, then how were they going to find time to warn Kenshin?

"Kaoru, have you found someone?" Dr. Gensai asked, sure she would say Kenshin, and praying she would at the same time.

Kaoru's eyes grew wide. She wanted to scream 'Kenshin! I love Kenshin!' but she stopped herself. She couldn't have him. No matter how much she dreamed, thought, or wished she could, she couldn't. She led herself to believe Kenshin would not want anything to do with a tomboyish little girl like her.

Why would he when he had already had someone as refined as Tomoe? After her, there was no room for Kaoru in his heart. Kenshin's relationship with his deceased wife may have been built over lies and deceit, but the feelings were still strong in his heart, and she couldn't even think of infringing upon that sacred place in his life. He had already sold it to someone else; and knowing Kenshin, it would remain that way. Admitting defeat, Kaoru bowed her head and bit back her tears.

_'Kenshin's just my friend… I'm only a friend to him…'_

"No..." she replied sadly, not even noticing when Dr. Gensai blinked in surprise and shock.

"What! Jou-chan..." Sano was cut off by Yahiko's hand being thrown over his mouth.

Yahiko looked over at Sano, surprised, sad, and speechless. Sanosuke appeared to be shocked and betrayed all at once. He had a gamblers instinct that wasn't too sharp, but when it came to reading the faces of his friends and knowing their inner desires, he was always on the dot. That's the only reason why he and Megumi got along.

But Kaoru refusing to take a chance to be with Kenshin? In his mind, that was utterly impossible. If he wasn't against hitting girls, he would have burst into the room and smacked her across the head like he constantly did to Kenshin.

"How could she say no? How? Why?" Sano quetioned, contemplating the facts that were all too plain to see.

"Sano... if Kaoru doesn't marry Kenshin, who will she marry?" Yahiko asked.

Both of them looked to the ground in complete shock and despair.

In refusing this chance to be with Kenshin, she had betrayed them all. Yahiko may have been young, but he knew that if Kaoru was to get married to someone else, Kenshin wouldn't be able to stay around the dojo, and he'd leave. Yahiko didn't want to lose his little family. Sano didn't think he'd be able to watch Kenshin mope around, or see the pain in Kaoru's eyes as she had to realize the mistake she had just made. It would be enough to send him flying out of Japan. And Kaoru…

She had just betrayed her own heart.

* * *

"He's here to what!" Kenshin asked loudly, causing Megumi to take a step back.

"You heard me Ken-san, Kiyo is here looking for a wife, or so I have been told." Megumi stated, pushing her hair back with the usual saucy movement. "I wonder who the lucky bride will be."

_'Lucky? How? Something about that man is not right. It's a faint feeling, but it's there,'_ Kenshin thought to himself.

"Ken-san you had better propose to the tanuki before Kiyo gets there first." Megumi teased.

Kenshin's eyes shot open, big and wide like pools of the violent violet sea. Come to think of it, Kiyo was heading in the direction of the dojo. He couldn't be! Could he? Was he actually going to see Kaoru?

"Ken-san, I was only kidding, don't worry so much." she reassured, immediately noticing the strange look that had crossed Kenshin's face.

He couldn't help it. Why did Kaoru have to be single? Why hadn't he already taken her to be his wife? What the... where did that come from? Why was it that these thoughts only came when it was too late to turn them around?

The point that Kenshin was trying to make within his confused mind was that he wanted to be with Kaoru, he didn't want her to leave him. He wanted her to be his, but she could never be. She just couldn't. Even with the confidence boost she had been giving him with her demand of 'you're not a sessha so stop calling yourself that', he still didn't find himself worthy. But even if he wasn't, he didn't want to see her with anyone one else, even if he did try to tell himself that he had to.

And he definitely would not hand her over to a man like Kiyo.

* * *

"I have already lined up a suitor for you, Kaoru." Dr. Gensai said, looking down because he was not willing to look at her face.

"Dr. Gensai, no! Tell me you're kidding! If I'm gonna marry someone, I want it to be because I love them." Kaoru said, a tear running down her face. "Don't tell me this is really happening…"

The feeling that had been plaguing her the night before came back, infesting her gut and causing her to want to hurl. Why did this have to happen?

"Wait till I get my hands on Dr. Gensai! How could he do this to Jou-chan and Kenshin?" Sano screamed while standing up and attempting to rush into the room.Yahiko pounced on his back, biting his hair and throwing both of them off the porch of the dojo.

Kaoru opened the door to find out where that yelling was coming from, and when she saw nothing, she closed the door again. Yahiko let out a breath he had been holding and then spit out the pieces of Sanosuke's hair that had caught in his mouth from the profound amount of chewing he performed.

"Sano! What are you? Crazy? You can't just barge in after what we just heard!" Yahiko whispered frantically, trying to control his own temper.

They crawled back to the door and began to listen again.

"Dr. Gensai, please... don't make me marry someone I don't love." Kaoru pleaded.

Dr. Gensai looked at her face, reminding himself of when she was a child and she would cry when her doll broke, or she fell and scraped her knee, or even worse, when her parents died. Kaoru's tears always fell with a reason, and he hated to be that reason.

"I'm sorry...I can't... I promised them. Please forgive me Kaoru." Dr. Gensai said. Kaoru fell into his arms and began to cry, crying like the small child she once was.

"He'll be here soon." Dr. Gensai managed to say with choked words. Kaoru slowly lifted her head, trying to wipe away the tears that refused to stop.

"I understand." Kaoru said as she got up and began to walk out the door.

Sano and Yahiko didn't even bother to move anymore. They just looked up at Kaoru from where they sat on the ground. They were mad at her and sympathetic for her at the same time. How could she deny that she wanted to be with Kenshin? How?

She walked past them, into her room, and shut the door behind her. No sooner had Kaoru shut the door, thand did Kenshin swing the dojo gates open, running faster then he ever had in his life. He noticed Yahiko and Sanosuke sitting on the porch and rushed up to them. There was no sign of Kaoru anywhere, and both of them looked withdrawn and completely in despair.

"Where's Kaoru-dono? I need to speak with her!" Kenshin stated almost frantically.

Neither Sano nor Yahiko responded, only stared at him, at a loss for words. How could they tell him his life was about to be ruined? How could they tell Kenshin that he was going to lose Kaoru that day to another man that she didn't even love? How did they explain something so profound to a rurouni with no where else to go?

"Kenshin, may I have a word?" Dr. Gensai asked as Kenshin walked past Yahiko and Sano into the dojo.

"Dr. Gensai, where is Kaoru?" Kenshin demanded.

"Sit down my boy."

"Where is she?"

"Sit down…"

"Where is..."

"Sit down, goddamn it!"

Kenshin was taken aback by Dr. Gensai's sudden outburst. He sat down, arms crossed, ready to hear what ever he has to say. After that, he was going to find out where Kaoru was at. In his mind, whatever Dr. Gensai had to say was not of as much importance as what he needed to talk to Kaoru about.

"What I have to tell you may not be easy for you to hear…" Dr. Gensai explained the will, and what Kaoru had to do.

Kenshin couldn't believe what he was hearing. But he had to know one thing...

"Did she agree to all of this? Does she want to marry this man?" he questioned, trying to believe that Kaoru was not going to be subject to the injustice he had just heard of.

"No, I'm afraid she is heartbroken. But she has to understand, I have to respect her late parents wishes." Dr. Gensai said. "He'll be here any minute."

Kenshin looked straight at Dr. Gensai. "You already found someone for her?" Kenshin asked, in a bit of a rage.

"Yes, He's wealthy, smart, and I know he will take care of Kaoru." Dr. Gensai assured him.

"No…" Kenshin whispered as he walked out of the dojo. "I won't let her leave me. Not yet! She can't! She's what makes me who I am!" Kenshin said. "Without her, there is no us-- this group we've managed to make will end if she leaves."

"Kenshin, you can't let Kaoru get married! You can't!" Yahiko cried.

Kenshin looked over at him. This was one fight he wouldn't be winning. Even if within his soul he knew this wasn't right, he couldn't fight it anymore than he already had. Kaoru respected her father dearly, and therefore, she would do whatever her father wanted, even if it tore at her and drove her over the edge of sanity. But he couldn't blame her or anyone else because this was his fault. He had waited too long tell her what he felt, and now he was paying the consequences, and so was she. There was no guarantee that she would have returned his feelings, but at least she wouldn't have been with some man she didn't even know or love...

It broke his heart to know what she was getting into.

* * *

Kaoru listened from her room. Everything was going so well, how could everything go so wrong so fast? She and Kenshin were finally starting to get somewhere, even if it was only slowly. What would happen to everyone after this was all over? What would happen to Kenshin? There were so many excuses flying through her head over why she hadn't just said she wanted to be with Kenshin, but she knew the main excuse. She didn't want to push him into something he didn't want. It wouldn't be fair to make him get married to her just because she was going to be sold off like a piece of meat.

She got dressed and brushed her hair. She stared into her mirror, not liking what she saw. Her face was puffy from crying and her eyes were sad and lost. It wouldn't be a problem facing her husband to be... but she couldn't face Kenshin like this. There would be a rerun of the night they had experienced just the night before, and in turn, it would break her heart more than it already was. At the moment, Kaoru was crushed.

* * *

Kenshin looked over to her room. He couldn't take it, he had to see her. Worry was driving him insane, and the small sniffles and sobs he could hear from his perch outside were calling him in; calling him to her. He brought up a shaking hand and knocked on the door. Shaking? Kenshin Himura was shaking? There were too many emotions playing through his head too quickly, and he tried to sum up his courage.

He had to see her before she was given away.

* * *

Kaoru walked over to her door and stood in front of it. She knew Kenshin was on the other side; he was always there when she had a crisis with his silent and calm reassurances and warm presence. He could calm the storms that raged within her heart, mind, body and soul… but now she was going to lose that.

She knew the way he knocked. She couldn't bring herself to open the door. She reached out for the handle, but the door flew open in a fury. Her eyes met his violet pools and for a moment, their faces said what they felt. No words could express what their eyes could.

How he wanted to hold her right there and then, tell her he loved her and this nightmare would be over. Kenshin could barely control what he was doing, and he had to grip the doorway to keep himself from barging inside. Kaoru pulled her hands behind her, afraid they might end up wrapping themselves around his neck, connecting them in a loving embrace.

All the things that could have fixed the moment and changed the outcome never occurred. Neither of them realized all Kenshin had to do was say the words...

Kenshin opened his mouth but nothing came out. He couldn't bring himself to tell her. The hurt on her face told him everything he needed to know, and he couldn't force her to carry his words with her through this struggle.

"I-I..." Kaoru attempted but stopped as she heard the dojo gate being open.

Kenshin heard the foot steps and the ki was familiar. Before he turned, he already knew who it was. When he did turn, his fears were proven.

None other then Kiyo Nishawagi stood in front of him.

* * *

Author's Notes: There we go, Chapter 2! Written equally by myself and Lady Himura.

3-

Crystal Renee


	3. Painful Partings

**Author's Note:** Here's chapter three. Written completely by me.

**Adrenaline Adoration**

**_Chapter 3- Painful Partings_**

Kenshin kept his gaze glued upon Kiyo, his hand set precariously upon the doorway of Kaoru's room. Kaoru kept her head bowed down, feeling the heat of Kenshin's tension in the air. She'd never felt a change in the air like this before unless Kenshin had been in the heat of battle. So why was he like this now? It was all too confusing to her, and in the puddle of thoughts and tears she had encompassed in her mind now, it only brought forth more pain. Her heart was beating with a infamous rythmn that she hoped to share with no one but the man that was the only obstacle between her and her fate outside the doorway.

Crystalline stars threatened to fall from the oceans within her eyes.

This was all so much, too fast, and her heart and mind couldn't bear it any longer. There would be no need for words between her and Kenshin anymore--- no matter how many times she tried to open her mouth and mutter something that would make sense, a sob would catch in her throat and she'd be forced to close her mouth in permanent silence once more. The reality of the thick fog of tension was bearing a weight upon her shoulders that she couldn't withstand, and she didn't wish to bear alone.

But this was how it had to be. This was her father's dying wish. This was the last thing her mother had spoken to her father about. They wanted her to be safe; they wanted her to be happy and married. If it meant to honor her family, then Kaoru was determined to do it. Kenshin would fight her from it, she knew. He could see into the depths of her soul and unravel even the most hidden sorrows in her heart. But she couldn't depend on Kenshin's comforts anymore. There was a man outside, she knew, waiting to take her hand in marriage.

This was how things had to be. She smiled despite the situation. This was all so ironic to her. She, Kaoru, the assistant master of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, the girl who fought off a fake Battousai, surived Jineh's Shino-no-Ippou, the girl who defeated Kamatari the Large Scythe, who rescued Kenshin from the unforigiving blade of Enishi Yukishiro, was backing down without a fight. The girl who took in a pickpocket, street fighter-for-hire, an opuim maker, and an ex-hitokiri, was allowing her life to be torn to shreds without a second thought. The girl who everyone shied away from because of her talent in kendo, because of her stubborn nature, was yeilding to a man she didn't even know. The daughter of a man who had created his own sword style, had been part of the sword bearing police, had survived the death of his wife, was not trying to upkeep the ideals and strengths taught to her. For the first time in her life, despite all the unexpected twists and turns in the intricate tapestry of her life, Kaoru was throwing herself to the wolves.

She had never felt so vulnerable or frightened in her life.

Taking her trembling hand and placing it upon Kenshin's arm, she called his attention to her without speaking a word. His attention averted away from the man that was going to steal away the rope that tied the disfunctional family of friends together so he could take in her expression. Kenshin had never seen Kaoru so broken in his life; the way her eyes looked so dull and the silent smile upon her lips.

Had she not had her hair high on her head or been wearing such a brightly shaded kimono, he could have sworn she was the image of Tomoe. The same sad expression and eyes of a woman torn from the fires of her life, from her one chance at happiness, the same delicate features that held in so many regrets, secrets, and the broken spirit that could never be mended by the hands of an angel. She didn't speak as she pushed his arm down, and she walked with a grace he had never noticed in her, the same kind of dainty steps that brought a broken woman into her fate.

"Hello, may I ask who you are?"

_'And the same fragile, soft voice and words…'_

Kenshin's eyes flew from Kaoru to the man that would be her demise. She had been too gentle when she'd touched his arm; it haunted him. Kaoru wasn't supposed to be like this; this was the exact opposite of what Kaoru was. The livilness, vivacity, and tenacitiy were lost in her. She had succombed to her destiny and was prepared to go through with the decision that had been forced upon her. If he could, Kenshin wished so vainly to go back in time and destroy the creation of such a will.

It was destorying two lives, not just one.

The man smiled warmly upon Kaoru. "My name is Kiyo Nishawagi, and I do believe I am here as arranged by a will, to take the young Kaoru Kamiya's hand in marriage. Would you be she?"

His voice caused Kenshin's hair to stand on end. When they had met up in the market, Kiyo hadn't been that official or that polite. He hadn't been so refined. He had been somewhat, but not the point he was being toward Kaoru. Kaoru placed her hands before her and linked them agaisnt her legs, her head held low so she was facing the dirt of the dojo yard.

"I am she."

Sanosuke took his eyes away from Kaoru and toward Kenshin. The frustration and helplessness was etched within the contours of Kenshin's face, and Sano couldn't help but feel pity for his friend. As much as seeing Kaoru, his little sister, like she was now, angered and pained him, he couldn't image what it was doing to the man who loved her with the ferocity that Kenshin did. Each step that Kiyo took closer to the Kaoru, the softer and more desolate Kenshin's gaze became, before he finally turned and walked away, unable to stare upon the loss before him any longer.

Kaoru could never be his. He had reminded himself of such day after day, night after night, moment after moment. She wasn't meant for him. She never was.

But the reality… the reality of actually losing her… it was so much worse than he had thought it'd be…

Kiyo took her hand and kissed her knuckles gently, keeping his charming smile up and soft cobalt eyes upon her face. "You are much more goregous than I had expected, Kaoru-koishii."

Kaoru squirmed inside at the proximity of his closeness, but on the outside she kept her smile dilluted smile up. "I wish I could say the same of you, but I only just now found out that I even had an arranged marriage."

"Understandable. Gensai-sensei called upon me as soon as he remembered." Kiyo responded. "Shall we adjorn inside?"

Kaoru nodded. "Yes."

Kiyo took a hold of Kaoru's hand, squeezing it softly before he let her lead him inside of the dojo. Yahiko turned to Sanosuke, who in turn averted his gaze to Dr. Gensai. Dr. Gensai looked bewildered upon the now empty path that Kiyo and Kaoru had taken toward the dojo.

"You do know what you just did, don't you?" Sano asked him, his voice low and nearly carnivorous. "Kenshin and Jou-chan were so close… so close…"

Yahiko looked dejectedly toward the room Kaoru now sat within next to Kiyo, her delicately fake smile still up. "When did she get so… refined and delicate? That's not the usual busu… wow, she must really be upset…"

"I… Kiyo was only back up. I was positive she'd say she wanted to be with Kenshin. Had she, I was going to tell Kiyo to turn around and leave. But… Kaoru-chan said she had no one." Dr. Gensai stated. "This…"

"I don't like him." Sano huffed, taking up residence agiasnt the dojo wall. "He gives me the creeps and I don't trust him, especially with Jou-chan."

Yahiko nodded his silent agreement. "Hey, where did Kenshin get off to?"

Sano shook his head at Yahiko. "Where do you think? Kenshin couldn't stand to see Kaoru ripped from him so easily. He left. I can't blame the poor guy. If I were him, I'd have decked Kiyo in the face by now. But that's not Kenshin's nature. He's a passifist. Sometimes I wish I could deck him."

"Do you think things will still work out? That Kenshin will still…" Yahiko questioned, trying to keep his voice low so that the couple inside couldn't hear the conversation.

"I think he wants to so badly, but he can't bring himself too." Sano stated, postioning his fishbone within his mouth so it was in an angry pout along with his mouth.

"Sanosuke?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't think I'm hungry anymore."

"Me neither, Yahiko, me neither."

* * *

It had long since grown dark, and Kenshin hadn't moved. There was no reason for him too change his position, not when there was no longer a reason. He'd lost Kaoru. The realization of everything he'd be losing was catastrophic, and each new, small detail tore a new hole in his patchy heart. There would be no more kendo instructor wake up calls, no more 'Kenshin, will you make dinner' requests, no more nights sitting outside her door in a protective manner. 

He couldn't protect her anymore. It was now Kiyo's responsibility. If any of Kenshin's enemies decided to turn up, it wouldn't be his job to be positive Kaoru was left out of the crossfire. It wouldn't be his job to weigh the dangers anymore. Everything was up to Kiyo now. Kenshin's heart fell. He had always prided himself on being able to protect Kaoru as well and long as he had. But now, that was over.

Kenshin ripped his gaze away from the puddle that was forming in the dirt before his feet. It had begun to rain as soon as he had sat beneath this sakura tree, overlooking the vastness of the river that flowed with the memories made beside it.

Where was he to go now? He'd never be able to stay at the dojo again. Kiyo wouldn't want him there; he would only sense him a threat toward his relationship with Kaoru. The place he had called home, where Kaoru had demanded he always come back to, was being ripped away from him. The roots he had set down, the comfort he had experienced, was all being sold away to a new man.

The droplets of rain had already penitrated through the leaves and blossoms of the tree, drenching Kenshin straight through to the bone. Thunder rumbled in the background, lightening flashing with the anger Kenshin refrained himself from expressing. Was he meant to have any comfort? Had there ever truly been a place meant specifically for him?

"Kenshin…" it was a shaky voice, one that bit through the chill of the darkened void. "Kenshin…"

He turned his head at the plea, looking solemnly around the trunk of the tree. His eyes fell upon Kaoru, standing in the middle of the thunderstorm. The kimono she wore was soaked through, her hands were held before her trying to retain the warmth. Her hair fell limp agaisnt her back, and her bangs stuck to her anguish filled face. The film over her eyes was no lie, and Kenshin's heart twisted again. She was crying, and she had come looking for him. Momentarily he wondered if he had worried her.

Kaoru burst out into a sob sudden and raced toward him, mud caking her drenched white tabi socks before she allowed herself to fall agaisnt Kenshin, her arms wrapping quickly around his body as she cried. The tears were warm agaisnt his neck, her sobs causing warm breaths to fall against his neck. After the initial shock had settled, Kenshin let his arms wrap around her body quickly, pulling her closer to him and off of the muddy grass and onto his lap. She gripped him tighter, her cries small murmurs of the truth that was tearing them both apart.

_'It wasn't supposed to be like this…' _Kaoru thought to herself.

Kenshin's own thoughts were muddled, but stayed prominent and true. _'This is my last time with Kaoru, I know. She'll never know what I feel, but…at least I can comfort her one last time, be her protector for the last night…'_

The sudden sound of thunder alerted Kenshin to a more meaningful fact. Kaoru was frightened of storms to the point of tears, but that wasn't why she was out here. She would never come out in a storm, even to find him, and he realized this. She had braved this strom to get to him, and now that she had, she was crying her heart out to him. These tears were something she refused to share with anyone else, a weakness she wanted no one to bear witness to.

Except for him.

"Kaoru-dono, shh… tell me what's wrong…" Kenshin pursuaded with a calm voice, letting his hand run through her rain slick hair.

"It wasn't supposed to be like this…" she responded between her sobbing. "I don't want to do this… Kenshin, I have no choice… why? I don't want… to lose everything… I don't want to lose… to lose you… I know you want to leave… but…"

Kenshin bit his lip from responding at first. "If you don't want me to, then I'll remain as close as I can."

Kaoru sat up on his lap, enough just to see his slowly dissolving resolve in his lavender eyes. "I… Kenshin this is all so fast…"

Absently he reached up, his hand pulling under her eyes and wiping the tears away that were mixing with the pure water of the rain that landed upon her face. The clouds cried with her, crying the tears Kenshin refused to shed. His hand dropped from her face to her shoulder, rubbing warmth back into her slowly shaking body. Her eyes were full of an aguish Kenshin couldn't find a proper word to describe. She was grieving over something she'd lost, just as he was.

"I know. I… do you want this?" he questioned her cautiously, his other hand splaying across the small of her back in order to keep her from falling backward.

She shook her head. "I have to, Kenshin… it's father's last wish. If that's what he wanted…I have to honor him. I have no choice. I don't… I don't want to be with Kiyo… I … I don't love him…"

She burst out into another fit of painful sobs, placing her head agaisnt Kenshin's chest once more, her hand gripping the comfortable and worn cloth of his magenta gi. To keep her calm, Kenshin continued murmuring to her, his lips close to her ear and agaisnt her hair, secretly leaving small kisses of compassion agaisnt her jasmine scented raven trendrils.

"Kiyo doesn't want to stay at the dojo…" she began again. "He says we need to leave it behind. I don't want to sell it. Kenshin… promise me you'll stay at the dojo, live there. I… it is your home. I want you to stay there."

Anger surged up from Kenshin's gut through to his mind, ripping apart any possible things he found okay in Kiyo. The dojo was everything to Kaoru; it was one of the few things she had left from her family. All the hardships she had ridden through to keep the dojo within her ownership, and now, one man was tearing her away from it. Kiyo was tearing Kaoru away from what she loved.

Who knew what else he was going to tear away from her?

"Kaoru-dono…"

"Promise me Kenshin!" she cried. "Promise! You have to take care of Yahiko for me, and how can you if you don't have somewhere… if you don't have a home… Kenshin… please…"

Kenshin set his lips agaisnt the top of her head, this time not being so secretive of his kisses. "Yes. I'll do this for you."

Her grip tightened. "Thank you…"

* * *

Author's Note: Well, that's all you get this time. I've waited so long to post this little bit. I'm so sorry, but Lady Himura was having computer problems. I couldn't help the delay. Forgive us? REVIEW!

DarknessFlame: What's there to forgive?

SSJHimura: twitch : Fluff………. Tooo much…………. Don't review………..

Crystal Renee: HEY: bonks him on head : Be nice! Or…………. I'll give your sister permission to do very mean things to you…………..

LadyHimura: plots revenge :

Love and hugs---

Lady Himura and Crystal Renee


	4. Dislocated Devotion

**Author's Notes:** Well... looks like I am the sole writer of this fan fic now.

**Adrenaline Adoration**

**_Chapter 4- Dislocated Devotion_**

Everything was so silent; the usual vivacious voices that would coat the air of the surrounding dojo were nowhere to be heard. Kenshin's head remained in its downcast position, a testament to only the surface of his raging emotions. It was all so confusing and articulate in his mind; he had been plagued with migraines for the past three weeks as he attempted to sort out his feelings and erase the uneasy feeling pitted in the center of his stomach. Nothing seemed to hold the same light as it had originally; it all just seemed to meld together in a grayish mixture, nothing contrasting from anything else in a bland, carbon copy world.

There was nothing that Kenshin could do. He had to admit it. As much as he hated to realize this was the reason for his grievances, he understood the truth. The deep anger attacking his senses and deepened sorrow that blanketed his heart were all sprung from the same incident and the same reason. Everything that was plaguing his existence were connected and rooted from the same misfortune, even though he understood there was no way that he could have changed the inevitable outcome.

He missed Kaoru, and he could never have her back.

Kiyo had made it a strict rule that Kenshin was not to attend the wedding—something, that despite heated arguments from Kaoru, had remained the same. At first it seemed a little odd, but Kenshin finally resigned from any possible complaint in the situation. In an attempt to convince himself that Kaoru was better off with another man besides himself, he had allowed it to roll off his back. There was no way he would have been capable of watching Kaoru being given to another man as it was, so it was for the benefit of their marriage that he not attend. If he had, Kenshin was positive he would have acted irrationally and completely out of character; Kaoru would never have made it toward Kiyo before he had managed to smuggle her away.

That had been two weeks ago, and as much as he attempted to deny it, Kaoru was no longer his to protect, and no longer his to please.

Everything he had worked so hard to perfect had been snatched away in a matter of days. Images swept throughout his mind, but there was one that had always remained fixated within his skull: Kaoru's face the moment she passed through the gates of her family's dojo. It had been a brash movement on Kenshin's part, and a last minute decision; he had cowered away from the scene before hand, knowing deeply within himself that there was no way he could watch her walk out of his life.

As long as he didn't see it, then she still remained in his life; she was just simply lost, and he would have to find her, like a game of cat and mouse. It was only a matter of time before he would stumble upon her, capture her and ravish himself within all the luxuries he had been denied for so long.

But despite all his attempts to force reality out of his mind, the truth still remained deeply rooted in his mind. Kiyo had managed to steal Kaoru away from him without a fight, and there was no way he could get her back or make up for his unconcerned actions. Kaoru was a woman proud of her family and their teachings, and thus would do anything it took to honor their memory. It wouldn't matter if she loved Kiyo or not—if it would help to keep the good name of her family and kenjutsu technique as honorable as the day they began, then she would overcome the obstacles and do it. But the look that had overtaken her eyes the moment Kaoru left the dojo…

It had been too much like Tomoe's eyes before she had fallen victim to her own emotions; far too tormented and distant.

Would Kaoru end up just like Tomoe had, and learn to love the man she was tied to by an unwanted twist in fate's tapestry of time? What kinds of emotional sacrifices would she be forced to make in order to survive the trials ahead of her? The drastic changes within her attitude had been devastating, even before she was forced to leave the home that she had grown up within. There had been a complete one hundred eighty degree change in her personality; the Kaoru that left the dojo was not the same Kaoru that had dwelled within it.

That forced another flicker of anger to erupt deeply within Kenshin's subconscious. Fate had dealt yet another unfair hand to the woman most important to him; he had promised himself that things would be different with Kaoru than they had been with Tomoe. And with all its irony, they were; while both of them were torn away from him before their time, at least Tomoe had been with him when she left. Kaoru was still aimlessly traveling about, waiting for her demise with a man she didn't love and in a shell of her former self.

This, with a second bout of irony, was the same as Tomoe's fate. It was quite odd how history could repeat itself.

_'I haven't atoned far enough yet for all I have done; obviously Kami has decided agaisnt allowing me the small comfort of being able to love someone'_ He thought bitterly before standing.

Kaoru had yet to write. She had promised to send them a letter a week, and to visit them as frequently as she possibly could. Kenshin had not seen or heard from her since the night by the river; neither had Sanosuke or Yahiko. That small abyss in their connection to Kaoru was unnerving; it wasn't like her not to honor a simple promise such as that. Kenshin had assured himself he wouldn't look into it; Kaoru would restore contact with them as soon as she could. All they had to do was wait patiently, and the day would arrive.

Kenshin was tired of waiting though, and his resolve cracked easier than he would have liked. He missed Kaoru something terrible; enough that he was prepared to leave the dojo and ask Tae for help. Tae usually had the heads up on almost everyone in the city; there was a good chance that if he asked Tae, he would be able to find Kaoru. Or, at least, it was worth a try. With all the different people that would pile into the Akabeko, there was a chance that someone had mentioned Kaoru nonchalantly in their conversation, and Tae had picked up on it as she served tables.

Picking up the shambles of himself from the porch of the desecrated dojo, Kenshin forced his feet to move in a normal rhythm out of the dojo and onto the streets. He hadn't left the dojo since Kaoru had; it was almost as if he was afraid to stumble across her smiling with her newly found husband. The image of Kiyo sent strange, catapulting emotions through Kenshin; just the thought of Kiyo made him angrier than any visit from Saitou. In fact, Kenshin realized with an unenthusiastic grin, he couldn't remember being this angry for such a prolonged period of time. He wasn't even this enraged with himself over all the people he had murdered.

There was more a sadness to his reason of atonement than anger. He suffered more sadness with himself over destroying Tomoe's life and happiness; he suffered more sorrow over her betrayal and final attempt to rescue him than selfish anger. There was more pity toward Enishi's attempt at snatching Kaoru from him than there was anger; and Kenshin suffered more disbelief in himself over Jineh's ability to take Kaoru from him and nearly murder her. Every time he battled with Saitou, it was simply over the samurai instincts instilled within him; there was no anger toward Saitou, simply the dividing line over ideals.

There was never a time that Kenshin could remember being this angry for so long, other than his argument with Hiko before he ran off to join in the effort to bring down the Shogunate and Bakufuto restore peace within Japan. And even then, Kenshin had not been as angry as he was now; there were so many different levels to his newly found, firing rage. As much as he wished to tear Kiyo apart piece by piece, he had to rationalize that it was as much his fault as it was Kiyo's for coming. All he had to do was tell Kaoru sooner what he had felt for her; if he had, this entire incident would have never occurred.

But of course, he could never be positive on that possibility either. Kaoru had never come forward with her own emotions toward him; his only ability to formulate a hypothesis on her position was how jealous she would get when Megumi shamelessly flirted with him. Another sad smile graced Kenshin's lips; he missed the arguments between the two women and having to butt in between them. Memories of such events would never be enough to contain the longing he felt.

Blinking when he finally registered the sounds and places around him, Kenshin realized that he had managed to travel all the way to the Akabeko without thought. Turning to the doorway and entering, he was pleasantly greeted by a young girl in the orange and black striped kimono of an Akabeko waitress. Her brown hair settled around her shoulders and she blushed when she spoke, but Kenshin only offered her a gentle smile and covered up the anger that was bursting within him.

"Himura-san! Nice to see you! How have you been?" Tsubame questioned, an embarrassed smile over her lips. "Would you like me to escort you to a booth and get you some tea?"

"There is no need for such formalities, Tsubame-chan." Kenshin stated. "Actually, I came here to find Tae-dono. Is she in?"

Tsubame turned to the side and glanced toward the kitchen, then back at Kenshin. "She's in the kitchen with Yahiko-chan, I believe. You can sit in that booth and I'll go get her for you, okay?"

Kenshin nodded and sat in the deserted booth, watching as Tsubame finished her trip to another table to hand out water to the customers. She rushed to the kitchen, and then Tae emerged, a determined, business-like appearance to her. Sitting next to Kenshin as soon as she reached the booth, she smiled at him.

"How have you been? I haven't seen you since… well, never mind when I last saw you." Tae stated. "How have you been holding up?"

"I'm fine, Tae-dono." Kenshin assured her.

Tae slapped her hand down on the table abruptly in outrage. "That is a lie, Kenshin Himura, and you know it! How can you say you are fine when you didn't even show up at Kaoru's wedding or watch her leave? You haven't left the dojo since Kiyo turned up and took her away!"

"I… is it that obvious?"

"Whether you like it or not, Kenshin, you're an open book when it comes to your feelings for Kaoru." Tae told him without regrets. "I only wish you had been that open to her about them. When I mentioned Kiyo's name, a fire lit up in your eyes. You obviously harbor a lot of anger toward him."

Kenshin placed a hand on his left temple, feeling another ungodly migraine coming to his abused skull. "That is something I cannot help, Tae-dono."

"What finally got you to leave the dojo? I was prepared to do the same thing I did for Kaoru when you left for Kyoto, and force you to talk to me. There is no time in life to just mope around, you know!"

"I was wondering, Tae-dono, if you had heard anything from Kaoru-dono." Kenshin responded slowly. "I'm started to wonder about her; she hasn't written or visited like she promised."

Tae's face fell and she leaned back, thoughtfulness drawing a steel plated façade over her face. Deliberating within her mind over whether or not she should explain what she knew to Kenshin, she finally decided to tell him; he deserved answers more than anyone else did, she decided.

"I ran into her in the market a week ago with Kiyo. She was following behind him slowly while he talked to some of his business buddies. When I tried to talk to her, she mumbled a hello and kept her eyes on her feet. Kiyo turned to me then back at his business partners and said he needed to go. He instructed Kaoru to follow him and she did. A few days ago she came into the Akabeko on her own, asking for some water. When I gave it to her, she asked to be alone. I left but stayed close by. She had some sort of injury on her arm that she was cleaning; I don't know what it was. I came back later and she refused to talk." Tae explained. "I was planning on finding you to alert you when I had more information; I'm not used to the passive Kaoru that Kiyo has managed to beat her into."

Kenshin's eyes fell into small slits. "He's beating her?"

Tae's hands flew in front of her. "No, no, that was a figure of speech, Kenshin! I haven't heard of any abuse from him toward her, just deep possessiveness."

"Oh." He muttered. "Where are they living?"

"I couldn't tell you Kenshin, to be truthful." she responded. "They're still in the Tokyo area."

"Thank you Tae-dono." Kenshin answered, standing slowly. "That's really all I wanted to know."

"Are you sure you wont have some tea or something to calm down over? I think what I told you only managed to add fuel to the fire."

Kenshin shook his head. "No, I'm fine. I need to go see some other people as it is. Good day, Tae-dono."

Standing up and proceeding out the doorway, Kenshin turned in the opposite direction of the dojo and swam farther into the swarms of people and deeper into the heart of Tokyo. His trip was not completed yet; there were still a few more people he wished to see while he was out.

* * *

The police station was a large, western style building that screamed authority and punishment. Kenshin had resolved to come here at the last moment; he had failed in his search for Sanosuke, and Megumi had ,oddly enough, not been at the clinic. There weren't many other places he could go, and with the new suspicions Kenshin had on Kiyo, the police station seemed like the correct place to be going. The only part of this trip that was scratching at the surface of Kenshin's self conscious was the person he was coming to see.

Stepping within the doors, Kenshin walked up to a young recruit behind a desk. The recruit looked up and nodded toward Kenshin, acknowledging the fact that he was in the room.

"Can I help you?"

Kenshin finished his trip to the desk before responding. "I'm here to see Officer Fujita, if that is at all possible."

The recruit cringed. "Do you have an appointment? He really doesn't like to be bothered when he's working, especially when he's reviewing some top secret junk for the government."

"Just tell him Himura is here to see him. I'm positive he'll make time for me."

Standing and rushing off as quickly as he could, the recruit disappeared down a hall. Kenshin entertained himself by practicing his ki sensing; there were six people in the hall the recruit had just disappeared down, and one of them was obviously Saitou. Soon enough the man in question appeared in the hall, a cigarette dangling loosely from his mouth as he held the ever present smirk he saved specifically for his all time foe.

"So you came to see me this time, Battousai. This is a little out of character for you; I didn't think you were the one to initiate a fight." Saitou stated, leaning agaisnt the wall across from Kenshin.

"I didn't come to start a fight, but if that's what you wish, I'm prepared for that too." Kenshin reasoned smoothly. "I came to ask you a favor."

Saitou's smirk increased, but he kept his demeanor cool. "I can almost guarantee my answer will be no, but do please humor me in continuing with your request."

The glare that Kenshin sent at Saitou was deathly, but he managed to keep his voice calm. "I was wondering if you would look into a Kiyo Nishawagi for me. Call it a hunch, but there is something about him that doesn't sit well with me."

"No." Saitou remarked. "Just because he was the one who ended up with the tanuki is no reason for me to bother looking into something that will turn up with nothing in the end."

"I have a good reason to believe there is more to him, and it has nothing to do with Kaoru." Kenshin responded. "Obviously he is skilled, but there is just something about his personality that doesn't sit well with me. He's contradicting himself."

"Do you have any proof that he's committed any crimes at all?"

Kenshin opened his mouth, and then closed it. There would always be loopholes when it came to trying to get Saitou to help him; but in the end, he had seen no other choice in the matter. Now he mentally cursed himself for even taking the time to try and sway Saitou to seeing things in his perspective.

"I don't have any proof other than my own senses, and how often have they led me astray?" Kenshin tried to bargain.

"I will see you later Battousai. Thank you so much for interrupting my work for something as moronic as this." Saitou stated, turning back down the hall. "If I wasn't at work, we would have dueled as well."

_'Now that I have Battousai's own questionings on Kiyo Nishawagi, maybe I can get permission to investigate this further.' _He thought to himself before disappearing into a random room.

* * *

Defeated and still without the answers he wanted and a new multitude of questions, Kenshin grudgingly entered the dojo again. It was dark and morbid feeling inside, but he ignored the sensation of foreboding. All his thoughts were trained to solving the problem of getting someone to help him. It didn't matter to Kenshin what everyone else thought his reasons were for looking into Kiyo; they were petty, in the end, but he had a bad feeling Kaoru's safety was in danger.

Lighting a lantern to illuminate the area around him, he proceeded to sit and continue with his thoughts. Despite the long line of people he knew and had ties with, he was running out of allies that he could have help him. What kind of person would be able to sneak around enough to dig up the information that he need on Kiyo and Kaoru?

"Aoshi." Kenshin mumbled, standing suddenly and searching for the closest paper to begin his letter on. "Aoshi and the rest of the Oniwabanshu will gladly help me with this; and if they do not, Misao most defiantly will make them."

_Aoshi—_

I am sorry to bother you so abruptly, but this is something I cannot do without your help. I need you to look into a man named Kiyo Nishawagi; as you will find out, if you haven't already, he and Kaoru-dono are wedded. He is a business man, who I am assuming is well to do, but there is something about him that really bothers me; I cannot pin point it. Tae-dono told me that they still dwell within Tokyo, but I cannot give you much more than that to start your search on. Kaoru-dono has changed drastically since they were married, and I have a reason to believe it's not just the normal transition from being single to being married.

I am relying on your help.

Kenshin Himura

* * *

Kaoru settled into her kneeling position, reminding herself to keep her hands folded in her lap and her eyes downcast; she would be eating what was left over after Kiyo finished his meal. She bit her lip to contain the wish to fill the unnervingly silent room with conversation; she knew better than to cross Kiyo with her trivial bits of conversation.

"You are getting better in the kitchen, Kaoru-koishii." Kiyo responded. "I take it you did as I said and had Miako-san help you?"

His response was a mute nod. Miako came into the room to finish placing the food that Kaoru had prepared out onto the table, before returning to the kitchen to wash the dishes. Kiyo continued to bask in the silence and continue eating his meal; his face would contort every once in a while, but otherwise his response remained neutral toward the flavor and texture of the food. Kaoru remained in her position, her mind blank of most coherent thoughts.

She missed Kenshin and the rest of her friends; but she was married now, and according to Kiyo, when you were married, sacrifices had to be made. Although she felt as if her sacrifices were much more acute than his, she knew better than to complain about it to him. Arguments never gained anything for her in the end, and only served to gratify Kiyo's picturesque image and power. As much as she despised her new position in life, she kept replaying Kiyo's words in her head.

_'You cannot be happy unless you try to. I can't make everything wonderful for you, but I will try. You need to do the same.'_

That was why she turned to Miako to help her with the cooking; Kiyo was worse with his comments than Yahiko had ever been. Miako was the maid of the large mansion-sized home that Kiyo and Kaoru dwelled within, and she always had a smile for Kaoru, even though it seemed fake and full of pity most of the time. At least it wasn't a smile of spite and demented joy like Kiyo's were.

"You went to the Akabeko a few days ago, didn't you Kaoru?" Kiyo interrupted her train of thought.

"Hai." She responded. "Only to get some water to clean the wound on my arm, though."

"But you went anyway, even though you know I don't want you to."

"I'm sorry Nishawagi-sama; I didn't think you would be upset if I didn't say anything or stay, I will never do it again."

She soon felt herself falling to the floor, pain ricocheting through her skull with the force of the blow that Kiyo sent to her cheek. Not responding to the punch she had received, Kaoru remained motionless upon the floor. Kiyo stood and walked toward her, kneeling by her and then taking her face in his hand, squeezing roughly as he lifted it to face him. Wincing slightly, Kaoru managed to open her eyes to look at Kiyo as if there was no emotion or fear behind her gaze.

"You did it, even though you knew it was forbidden. You really do need to be punished, Kaoru." Kiyo stated. "But what way will be the best, is what I wish to know."

"I don't now, Nishawagi-sama." She answered quietly, turning her gaze to the floor. "I was wrong, I know."

Kiyo snapped his wrist, causing her head to smash roughly with the hard wooden floors of the room. Kaoru cried out silently in pain but remained motionless. She could hear Kiyo reach over toward the table and take hold of something before letting it hover over her body.

"I'm making a new rule, Kaoru-koishii." He stated calmly. "I am far too busy to be watching you all the time; from now on, you will perform your own punishment."

Forcing her to sit up, Kiyo held a small kitchen knife out toward her palm. Kaoru blinked as she looked at the small blade, wondering what exactly Kiyo had in mind. He instructed her to hold it, and she hesitantly allowed her palm to encircle the sharpness of the steel. Twisting his palm, Kiyo made a small, painful incision into Kaoru's hand. She closed her eyes and bit her lip roughly until she felt Kiyo let go of the knife.

"Each time you do something you know will cause me to get angry, I want you to give yourself punishment. Take this knife and cut yourself each time you do something you shouldn't." Kiyo stated.

"But…"

"Kaoru…"

Silently pleading for the pain to go numb, Kaoru flipped the knife over so she had a hold of its handle and then proceeded to swipe the blade across her right arm. Blood fell from her palm and down her arm, and she used her kimono to keep it from staining the pristine floors. If it did, she would have to cut herself again. Kiyo smiled and then kissed her gently on the forehead before standing up.

"Good. See? It's not that hard, and so much easier, wouldn't you agree? Now eat, and then go to bed. I will be there waiting for you. For now, just eat. And, remember I love you, but sometimes you just need to be punished. I can't allow you to misbehave, Kaoru-koishii"

Kiyo left the room, and Kaoru stared at the knife in her hand. Her blood was still over the steel, and oddly enough she preferred this to the beatings she would usually get from Kiyo when she did something wrong. Scraping the knife across her arm again, she silently stated what she did wrong.

"I went to the Akabeko and let someone see the injury."

And then she proceeded by slicing three more long cuts into her arm, and slowly began to allow the tears to fall down her cheeks.

"I thought about Kenshin once today."

* * *

Author's Notes: I told you this was an angst story, now didn't I? Don't kill me. If you want to kill anyone, kill Kiyo, okay? He is the evil one. I'm just the one that has to somehow explain how he is evil. I will try to get another chapter out before the end of July, okay? 

Please review! I want to see if I can hit 100 reviews by chapter 5! I will try to do review responses in the next chapter. All your reviews keep me writing, and help me keep my ideas churning. So feed me with those reviews, and maybe you will get a chapter much sooner.

Love and hugs—

Crystal Renee


	5. Obliterated Obstacles

**Author's Notes:** Well... I hope to clear up some things you didn't like to much in the last chapter.

**Adrenaline Adoration**

**_Chapter 5- Obliterated Obstacles_**

Kenshin wandered aimlessly around the marketplace; he had originally left the protective confines of the dojo in order to buy more rice. Having already succeeded in the task far too quickly for his liking, Kenshin began to feel uneasy about returning to a home that would be empty. Normally Kaoru would have gone shopping with him; since she left, Kenshin had never even bothered to leave the dojo and stock up on food. If he didn't cook, then Tae or Megumi would smuggle some food into the kitchen for him. It had been odd how bored he managed to become over the course of three months since Kaoru had disappeared with Kiyo; there was still no communication from her, but Kenshin had managed to keep that thought out of his mind.

His busy days had suddenly become much shorter; the laundry never took hours to do any longer, the dojo was constantly in pristine shape since Yahiko had moved in with Sanosuke, all the rooms around the house were clean down to the crevices in the wood grain. All Kenshin could truly do to entertain himself was either think or train, andhe had taken to training quite quickly; thinking always managed to either make him angry or upset, and he would much rather ventilate those emotions through his sword. Having noticed the overhang of the trees surrounding the dojo yard, Kenshin had vowed he would cut them down; even if he had to go off and buy himself a katana to do the job, he would.

Luckily for him, the sakabatou managed to work fine; all he had to do was flip the blade, perform some fancy maneuver, and soon a tree branch had fallen to the ground, anxiously awaiting to be drug into a brush pile and burned. That job in itself hadn't taken very long; it was times like those Kenshin cursed the super sonic speed that the Hiten Mitsurugi techniques required. Everything sped by so quickly except for the minutes and hours of each day; the more he did, the less there was to do, until he had nothing to do but spend hours a day either soaking in the bathhouse, training, or staring blankly toward Kaoru's door and thinking.

None of the options ever entertained him enough, though, and finally Kenshin had decided to go shopping. He had extra money left over from helping the police take care of Shishio; it had been his secret stash, something that Sanosuke couldn't smuggle out of the dojo when he 'needed' to go gambling. It was a fair amount of change, he had to admit, and now he was glad that the police chief had convinced him to keep it. There was no possible way he could live off the money for the rest of his life, of course, which spurred a new idea into his skull of getting a job. That was quickly dismissed; even if he did try to, where would he get one? Creating the first laundry service in Japan?

Shaking his head, Kenshin turned his attentions back to other things. It had been a month and a half since Aoshi had agreed to help look into Kiyo Nishawagi's life; and there had not been a single report from the Oniwabanshu since. Kenshin had thought about writing to Misao and asking what kind of information they were keeping from him, but even if Misao was a vivacious, talkative girl, she knew the code of a ninja was to keep all things quite until told otherwise. The image of Misao attempting to extract information out of Aoshi was entertaining enough, but Kenshin knew better than to ask her to go through with it. Misao would most likely jump at the chance to question her 'Aoshi-sama', but Kenshin feared more for Aoshi's sake at end of Misao's chatter than for Misao herself in that pariticular scenerio.

Having not been paying attention, Kenshin slammed face first into another person, his face buried in their long raven hair. He pulled away and mumbled a myriad of apologies before allowing himself to look at the person he had run into. At first he could only distinguish it was a woman, and a very demure one at that, but she was facing away from him, obscurring his veiw of her profile. Taking a moment to compose himself and breathe, the thought suddenly hit him.

How many women in Tokyo walked around with their hair up in a ponytail secured with a blood stained indigo ribbon?

"Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin nearly shrieked. "Is that you?"

She turned and faced him, her eyes downcast and dripping an extreme sadness he wasn't accustomed to. When it finally settled in that she was looking at Kenshin her eyes brightened momentarily and she smiled; there was so much she wanted to tell him, so many things that she wanted to know. Realizing her status, though, her eyes immediately shot back toward the dusty dirt of the main road. Kenshin reached toward her, but she jumped away, gripping darkly at the sleeves of her kimono to keep them around her wrists.

"I can't talk Kenshin…"

"Are you late? I'll walk you back home, that I will, Kaoru-dono…"

She gave him a deep, unexpectedly blank look. "I'm sorry, you can't Kenshin, I just… Nishawagi-sama is here, I'm just waiting for him to come back out."

Training his sight to her, Kenshin attempted to diffuse the problem she was trying to hide. Normally he could tell what exactly was wrong with her; Kaoru was an open book like no other, allowing the world to search through the pages of her life and personality without worrying what anyone else though. He knew something was wrong, but her eyes and facial expressions were devoid of any hint as to what it was. Her ki was weakened and trembling; it was almost as if she was afraid of him. But the fact that bothered him the most was why she was calling her husband by his surname instead of his first name; Kaoru had never called anyone by their surname unless they demanded her respect.

"Kaoru-dono…" Kenshin began before stopping and allowing his hand to reach out to a deep, blackened mark on her neck, extending from her left ear down to her collarbone. "How did you get that bruise?"

She shot back quicker than before, her hand shooting straight up to the mark on her neck. "I fell the other day on Nishawagi-sama's stairwell… I'm still getting used to the slippery floors. I hit my neck on the banister. It's alright; don't worry so much about me, you'll get wrinkles and grey hair."

_'She said that the night before Kiyo turned up, when we were at the dojo all alone…' _Kenshin reminded himself.

"If you say so, Kaoru-dono…"

"Oh Himura, how nice to see you again!" came the overly cheer-filled voice of Kiyo as he stepped in between the two. "I didn't expect to see you here."

Kenshin bowed, not liking the way Kiyo was looking at him. "Sessha was out to refill the rice bin at the dojo, that he was."

Kiyo smiled in an unnerving, cheesy manner. "Well then, Kaoru and I should be off, perhaps we will see you again sometime?"

"Hai."

Taking Kaoru by the sleeve of her kimono, Kiyo led her through the crowds, weaving in between the small gaps in the people. Kaoru allowed herself to be led forward; it would be better on her if she didn't fight Kiyo off now. There had been no time for her own punishment, she realized too soon; it was Kiyo's turn to take his own measures in discplinary action. She winced inwardly, and butterflies began to flutter around in her gut; she knew the procedure when it came to Kenshin. And as much of her dignity that Kiyo had already stolen, she was not prepared to give in to that much. It had been a deal at their wedding; Kiyo would wait for her consent to take her to bed.

And he hadn't.

Every time she spoke of Kenshin, Kiyo had reinstated the same form of punishment; directly to their room, and a single futon, no holding back. She had fought him the first few times, but Kiyo was stronger and larger than she was. The more she fought, the harder it was on her aching body. She had learned to push any thoughts of Kenshin aside; seeing him in the streets and conversing with him, even if she was trying to escape, would only add fuel to the fire of hatred Kiyo held for him. Slowly Kaoru let her tears fall, knowing if they fell now instead of later, it would be so much easier.

_'You've cursed me, Kenshin, and you don't even know it… I'm so sorry…'_

* * *

Swinging in a deep, deadly arc, Kenshin's sword penetrated the floors of Kaoru's untouched dojo. He let out a hoarse, rage filled cry before shooting off to perform another high-frequency technique; at the moment he wasn't positive how else to react to everything that was catapulting within him. Kiyo had destroyed the Kaoru he knew; he couldn't remember ever seeing Kaoru as scared as she had been when Kiyo took a hold of her and took her away. No enemy of Kenshin's had ever sent tremors to her heart like Kiyo was, and it made Kenshin even angrier to realize that it wasn't his position to save her from him. The only person who could protect her now was Kiyo, even if it was to protect her from himself. Kiyo had the right to see to her protection as he saw fit, and there was nothing Kenshin could do about it.

But that didn't mean Kenshin had to be happy about it. There was no use for the rurouni façade anymore; as much as he denied it, Battousai was still a part of the rurouni as well, and both parts of his heart and soul were itching to teach Kiyo a lesson. Still being able to control his emotional outburst, he had taken to pretending every single wooden object in the dojo and around it were Kiyo; pretty soon, there would be nothing left if he didn't stop, but Kenshin didn't care. He was too far gone to stop anytime soon. He could never have imagined feeling a rage this deep. At least Tomoe didn't have to suffer the way Kaoru was; Tomoe was never afraid of him, it was more him being frightened of her views toward him. Kiyo petrified Kaoru, and that only forced Kenshin to hate the man more than he had before.

A sadistic grin flew over Kenshin's face. So it was possible for him to hate someone; he had forgotten the last time he felt like he could. He didn't hate any of his enemies; more or less he simply pitied them. Saitou had always been a special case, though; Kenshin didn't hate the guy, he was just irritated by him. The fights they had always forced him to use the pinnacle of his skill, and he had always thought better of Saitou for forcing that much out of him; sometimes he wondered if they had been on the same side during the Bakumatsu, if they would have managed to be friends. They only had a rivalry; there was no hate to it.

Upon hearing footsteps entering the dojo, Kenshin spun toward the doorway, holding his sakabatou in a defensive stance. Anyone who decided to disturb him during his few moments of release would regret it; whoever it was had better have a better reason than 'revenge' for coming to him at the moment.

Aoshi turned the corner, his stoic gaze slightly amused with the condition of the dojo. "If I had known there was a fight here, I would have come prepared with more than the information you requested, Himura."

Kenshin let his sword slide back into its sheath and then allowed himself to examine the dojo for the damages he had caused. A deep sweat drop formed on his head; he would be in here reconstructing the dojo for a week, he realized unenthusiastically. At least that way he wouldn't be bored. Turning his attentions back to Aoshi, Kenshin motioned for him to walk toward the dining area.

Both men settled into kneeling positions and they shared a cup of tea in silence before either spoke again. Kenshin looked at Aoshi intently before he decided to ask for the information straightforward. It was still as difficult as ever to predict the man before him; not as difficult as Soujiro had been, but still vexing.

"What did you find out?"

Aoshi looked up at Kenshin between his bangs before positioning himself straightforward and closing his eyes to think. There were a few things he had discovered that he didn't want to explain, so he had to word his explanation to the Battousai without fault. He would know something was missing if he didn't meticulously plan out the wording of his report.

"They live in the richer part of Tokyo, approximately a quarter of a mile from the Akabeko. Kiyo is a business man as you stated, but he's not a normal businessman, as you presumed. Actually, in all truth, Kiyo isn't a normal man." Aoshi explained. "Kaoru is alone at the home most of the time with the maid Miako. I had Misao disguise herself and ask to become hired help for a while, until she had enough money to pay for a trip back to Kyoto, so most of the information is from her. I'm most surprised that Kaoru didn't discover who she was the entire time they were there."

"You're skipping details. How does Kiyo treat Kaoru?" Kenshin persisted.

The response that Kenshin received was complete and utter silence. Aoshi did not move from his position; he simply sipped some more of his tea. Kenshin allowed the silence to last for ten minutes before he became irritated and bored, and then asked once more. It was obvious to him that the answer wasn't a happy, flower strewn pathway as he had secretly been hoping; but then again, he had known that long before he had even asked Aoshi to help him.

"What is the relationship, Aoshi? You're skipping details, and I'm not letting you leave the dojo until you tell me!" Kenshin demanded, his eyes narrowing into small slits and slowly changing their color. "I need to know."

Setting his teacup down, Aoshi gave a cold stare directly back at him. "You're too brash Battousai, or else I would have told you already."

"Then tell me now, or I'll go find out for myself."

"It's not a good relationship, if you insist on knowing." Aoshi responded casually, taking another sip of his tea. "Kiyo tends to drink a lot, according to Misao, and he can easily become enraged to a violent proportion. Kaoru has not written or visited you because she isn't allowed to; Kiyo has made it clear that she isn't even allowed to mention your name, Battousai. For the most part they sleep in separate rooms, but Kiyo has taken Kaoru to his a few times."

"And?" Kenshin questioned. "Does she comply?"

Sighing, Aoshi continued. "She doesn't; apparently he was supposed to wait until she felt ready. So far, I have not heard from Misao or seen for myself of Kaoru ever once consenting to the actions; for the most part she fights, but Kiyo has overpowered her each time."

"He's raping her?" Kenshin demanded. "You weren't going to alert me to _that_? Aoshi, that's serious, and the police should be taking part in the case! If he's… raping her…"

"No." Aoshi responded, lifting his palm up and silencing Kenshin's uncharacteristic outburst. "They will not take action in this case, Battousai. Kiyo holds far too much power; he has the power to shut down the police stations if he wished. They won't interfere. And besides, you only listened to one part of what I said. He drinks and becomes easily enraged, as I stated before, but that's not it. He doesn't need to drink to randomly slap or hit Kaoru when he likes."

Kenshin didn't say anything; he kept his eyes narrowed toward the table, battling within himself for control. For all the wrongs Kiyo was doing, he still wouldn't let himself murder the man; even though the rurouni within him wanted to chop Kiyo into tiny little pieces, throw them to the wolves then burn the wolves and bury the ashes in the deepest lake he could find. It seemed that both parts were agreeing with each other, although Battousai's version of Kiyo's death was much harsher. But rash actions such as these wouldn't help the situation; it was more important for him to clear his mind and figure out how he was going to get Kaoru away from Kiyo.

"Don't think of rushing over there, Battousai." Aoshi warned. "Kiyo is a very skilled swordsman as well as businessman--- he fought during the Bakumatsu as well as you did, alongside the Bakufu. He has no reason to hate you, though; his squad and family never once came into contact with you, so he's not acting out of revenge, this is just the man he has become. I'm still looking further into his past; it seems that he had a wife before Kaoru and she died. We're not sure how she died yet."

"He probably murdered her." Kenshin responded, his fists tightening into the cloth of his hakama pants. "And he'll murder her too if I don't get her out of there!"

"I still have men around the home, Battousai. If he gets close to killing her, I promise they will stop it and get her out of there. Right now, you need to stay here until you can work out your thoughts and concentrate on making a plan for getting Kaoru back without hurting her more. As long as your mind is as clouded and confused as it is, you'll only be fighting blindly and you'll end up failing in the end. Meditation will help you a lot." Aoshi advised.

Kenshin glared at him. "If it was Misao-dono, would you be sitting here listening to me telling you that?"

"If it was Misao, she would be out of there. And he has shown his own aggression agaisnt her as well; don't think she's managed to get away unscathed." Aoshi responded, his voice dropping a few degrees in it's icy tone. "But I am not blindly running in to murder the man who hurt her. Give it time, and you'll figure something out. You're lucky that Misao was hired as Kaoru's personal maid; wherever Kaoru is, Misao will be there too. Don't allow your worry to get to you too much. Misao won't let Kiyo hurt Kaoru if she is there."

"I'm at least going to see what he's doing for myself; I'll decide if I have the time to sit back and think about how to get Kaoru out of this mess on my own." Kenshin responded flatly.

Aoshi nodded. "But if you make any brash attempts to retrieve her without alerting me first, I will have my men stop you, I assure you that much. We'll get her out when the time is right."

Kenshin walked past Aoshi, leaving him to himself to finish the cup of tea in his hands. He stormed off toward town, prepared to infiltrate the area surrounding the torture home holding Kaoru. Aoshi wanted him to wait; what if they didn't have time to wait? The longer they waited, the further within herself Kaoru would hide; and the further she hid, the harder it would be to pull her back. Of course, he rationalized, she would never be the same after these experiences, but the longer he waited, the more he felt as if he were betraying her in some way. There had never been a time that Kenshin had failed to rescue her when she needed him, and he wasn't going to let this time be the first. Even if Kiyo was her husband, Kenshin would not allow him to hurt _his_ Kaoru-dono.

How could he sit aside and let Kiyo take advantage of her like that, and then rely on the same man to protect her?

There were times when Kenshin wanted to be selfish; there were days when he wanted nothing more than to storm over, demand the ability to take Kaoru back with him, and then never let her go. He had known from the beginning that something was wrong with the whole situation; how Dr. Gensai had ever been able to convince him that Kaoru would be safe with Kiyo, he would never know. He wanted to blame someone for everything, and naturally Dr. Gensai was the first choice. But Kenshin knew it was truly no one's fault but his own; he was too slow in telling Kaoru what he felt.

It passed through Kenshin's mind momentarily to call on Sanosuke for help; but if Kenshin was going to be overly brash in his efforts to get Kaoru out, Sanosuke would prove to be less than an asset. If he required help, than he would defiantly turn to Sanosuke for it; until then, the entire incident would remain between Kenshin, Kiyo, Kaoru and the Oniwabanshu.

The streets were black, but the moon glowed an eerie orange color that melted into the sky with the odd amount of cloud cover. Kenshin traveled closer and closer to his goal, completely prepared to take whatever actions necessary to maintain Kaoru's safety. Aoshi's threat of sending his men after Kenshin didn't bother him; he could easily break through whoever Aoshi sent at him. If it was for Kaoru's sake, then Kenshin could overcome anything, no matter what means it took to do so.

* * *

Misao headed directly for Kaoru's room; after her bath, Kaoru had snuck off there alone. Misao understood why Kaoru had demanded a bath soon after coming home and spending time with Kiyo; the man was a maniac with no where to push off his aggressions other than onto Kaoru. There had been many times that Misao had to battle with herself not to kill the man on the spot; there were so many instances where he was unprepared, but she knew better than to blindly do what her body wanted her to. Aoshi had instructed her not to lay a hand on Kiyo; if she messed up, then someone was going to get hurt and she would be out of the picture.

She attempted to clear her mind; thoughts like these would defiantly jeopordize her disguise; this was the first time she had gone undercover, and she had done well thus far. There was no way she was going to fail now. The case was far too personal for her teenage blunders.

Opening Kaoru's door, she walked in with a smile on her face and traveled toward the hump on the futon.

"Come on Kaoru-sama; let's get you out of here and down to the kitchen! It's time for you and Miako-san to prepare dinner!" she chirped.

"I don't want to go Kisa-san!" Kaoru responded, sitting up in her futon and lifting her hands. "I don't want to… I'll poison the food with my dirty hands... I'll make it all wrong and I'll make it dirty, and then he'll hit me again…"

Misao kneeled next to Kaoru, glad the appearance she had used to disguise herself was working. "Listen to me, Kaoru-sama, you have to go. How could you dirty the food? You are as clean as the day I first came here, and I have yet to see you dirty, even once. I'm sure you'll be fine. I'll help out today if you would like! Do you want to me to set you out a new kimono and obi?"

Kaoru bit her lip and then nodded, wrapping her arms protectively around her body as Misao got up and left. She began to shake slightly; the images of her punishment were flashing through her head and making her dizzy, causing her to feel sick to her stomach. As much as she tried to persuade him, as much as she tried to fight him, Kiyo had still gone along with the grotesque punishment, and then Kaoru had punished herself for her own existence. Obviously that was what was making Kiyo so angry.

"How about this one?" Misao asked, knowing she was being overly sneaky with it.

Lifting her blank, half lidded eyes toward her maid, Kaoru suddenly hid under the covers and started shaking violently. Misao was holding up a kimono that Kenshin had purchased for her soon after their time in Kyoto; it was a light blue color, decorated with intricate yellow and silver blazen dragons and lilies. She hadn't worn it yet, since she had hoped to save it for a special occasion.

Dinner with Kiyo was not a special occasion. Anything concerning Kiyo wasn't a special occasion.

"Please Kaoru-sama; you'll look stunning in it!" Misao pleaded.

Taking the blade she kept in her bed and dragging it across her arm three more times before she even said anything, Kaoru allowed her head to emerge from the blankets.

"You know who got that for me. Nishawagi-sama…"

Misao pouted. "Kaoru Kamiya, I expected a better attitude from you! Nishawagi-san doesn't know, so why should it matter?Himura got this for you out of pure love; at least you can allow yourself the chance to imagine things are better for you!"

As soon as the words had left her mouth, Misao had regretted them. So much for her wondrous, month and a half long cover; Kaoru was sure to recognize her now. She bowed in defeat and then turned to go and find a new kimono for Kaoru.

"Misao?" Kaoru whispered. "I knew it was you all along… why are you here, anyway?"

Misao knew better than to tell Kaoru, but the girl had so little to look forward to anymore. "Do you really want to know? Put on this kimono and I'll tell you."

"I… I'll stain it. I need a red one." Kaoru stated.

Nodding and retrieving the darkest red kimono she could find, Misao knelt next to Kaoru again and whispered into her ear. "The reason I'm here is that Himura requested the Oniwabanshu to come and find you. He's been wondering why you haven't contacted him. According to Aoshi-sama, his request was really desperate. Kaoru, he wants to get you out of here! Knowing him, you'll be out soon enough if Aoshi-sama told him everything. Don't worry; you won't be putting up with this much long. We plan on taking you away in a week when Kiyo leaves for that business trip."

Tears sprung from Kaoru's eyes; she couldn't contain them any longer. There was still hope at the end of her tunnel, she realized with a sadistic smile. Kenshin was looking for her; he wouldn't let her stay here much longer. She would be free soon enough. She closed her eyes and prayed deeply to Kami that he would spare her the pain she knew would come; if Kiyo ever found her again… it would be the end of her.

_'Please give Kenshin patience… I want out of here… but he has to have patience…'_

"Are you coming, Kaoru-sama?" Misao questioned, putting on her maid façade once again.

"Hai, Kisa-san, I am."

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Argh, I feel like this is all going to fast………. But really it's not. Actually, it may be two chapters before Kenshin comes to get Kaoru. I don't know yet. But don't hate me! Hate Kiyo. Hate him. 

Please leave me a review, yes!

Love and hugs—

Crystal Renee


	6. Barricared Beauty

**Author's Notes:** Okay, this chapter was INCREASINGLY hard to start. And hard to write. And just plain on out difficult, thus the reason why I am going to dedicate it to elgaladangel, a good friend of mine who goes by the name Angie. She has helped me many many times over many many problems, and thus this chapter is dedicated to her. Love you bunches, girl. I also realize an update is way over due, but you will all have to forgive me. I had a hard time writing this, and I had writers block. I apologize. AND THIS STORY WON BEST ANGST FIC in the FHB Fanfiction Competition this summer. YAY FOR THE CONTEST! LOL! I'm also dedicating this chapter to Kawaii Lara-chan, a VERY good friend of mine. Love ya girl! Also... go to deivantART dot com and look up Dawa-chan and visit my friend Dawa-chan's gallery... and leave comments, please! I will... cry... if you don't!

**Adrenaline Adoration**

**_Chapter 6- Barricaded Beauty_**

Taking long, silent steps, Kenshin drew closer to the edge of Kiyo Nishawagi's property. The breeze that blew throughout the foliage was strong and chilling, causing the dust of this particular trail throughout Tokyo to whirl together in a miniature funnel. He ignored any indication of such occurances; Kenshin's full attention was pointed toward the building before him, secured on the horizon as the creamy sun set over green rolling hills. The image of beauty was a mask to the truths hidden within this street; a woman was suffering behind the walls of perfection. Corruption polluted the population, and now it had leaked and found a way to lick its tongue agaisnt the one person Kenshin had been trying to shelter from it.

His eyes fell into smaller slits, reflecting the anger that had began to lather his body. There was no escaping it anymore; even with the trained control Kenshin could boast of having, the urge to kill in his blood had surfaced past his skin and into his aura. He was in no means Battousai, but even so, that didn't mean it was impossible for him to feel the calling of justice he had in his youth. Clenching his fists as he drew closer, he attempted to push the feeling down inside of him, where he could box it up and store it in a forgotten corner within his mind. There had to be a way to keep it hidden from the world, and still manage to repress the urge to do exactly what he knew needed to be done. Kaoru would never forgive him, and he would never forgive himself. Killing was not an option here; such an extreme form of punishment was beyond the fingers of reasonable judgement.

But that didn't meant Kenshin had to like it.

Drawing upon the lush green carpet Kiyo could boast for a lawn, Kenshin slowly sunk back into the forest surrounding the torture mansion. Climbing up the trees, he found a nice resting place and settled his eyes upon the building, watching the crested windows for any signals of movement. Already he had sensed six of Aoshi's spies; he knew they all knew he was there. He hadn't attempted to come in by hiding his being in the shadows; he had wanted his appearance at the Nishawagi home to be obvious. Now he could watch in on the happenings of Kaoru's new home, knowing full well that should he jump in to take action, there would be people behind him, following. Even if they didn't realize it yet, that was part of his plan. They'd end up helping him instead of stopping him.

A deep dread began to root itself in Kenshin's heart; how would he respond to seeing Kaoru again? What kind of shape would she be in? He was afraid; if Kaoru looked worse than before, would he be able to contain himself? Would he find himself needlessly shedding blood again? And what if he saw Kiyo first, how would he end up reacting then? Doubts circulated throughout his mind, polluting his conscience. There were so many doubts and so many 'what if's' that he was almost regretting his brash decision to turn up at the Nishawagi residence. What if it was all a big mistake? What if he screwed up and only pushed Kaoru into a deeper state of danger?

He had to stop thinking that way. There was nothing wrong with him coming to check up on her; it was a righteous thing that could only come out helping Kaoru, not placing her in any deeper danger. If she needed to be rescued... there was no one better to fill the shoes of the hero than Kenshin himself.

* * *

Kaoru held her tears in; there was no reason to give Kiyo the satisfication of her silent, internal crying as he forced her to follow him down the forsaken corridors that mocked her situation. It was odd how she never really realized just how dungeon-like the gothic architecture of her new home looked unless she was being taken in for a torturous treatment. It didn't help that the walls were dark and windowless, reflecting the dark secrets they held with the lightless curves in the stonework. She should have known better than to let renewed hope keep her from submitting to Kiyo's wishes; she should have known that no matter how many cuts she placed upon her own skin, there was no way it would make up for mentioning Kenshin's name.  
Feeling the skin of her wrist twisting tightly within Kiyo's grip, Kaoru winced. Her arms hurt enough already as it was, and this was only causing the blood to squeeze from her wounds at a more rapid rate. She had not seen Kiyo in a fit of rage such as this one since she had started her self discipline within the first month of the marriage. The memories her last encounter with her husband in this state still stung deeply within her and foretold of her fate; there was no use in fighting him. She could never win.

He was always coming out on top.

If she could, Kaoru would have taken back everytime she believed she could escape, and she would stop believing in Kenshin... but she couldn't. There had to be some light in the deep, morbid forested life she was trapped inside, and that was it. She couldn't foresake the one thing that was making her life livable.

Feeling herself go flying into a dark, one windowed room, Kaoru braced her body for impact with the marbled floor. Instead of hitting the unforgiving stone, she found herself cracking her back upon the post of Kiyo's western styled bed and then landing roughly upon the upheaved sheets and comforter. The pain that shot through her body was intense, but she knew better than to attempt to rub away the inflamming bruise now housed inside her spine; Kiyo would not deal with any weakness from her. There was a punishment for everything she did... every last thing. Taking a deep breath and turning so she could face the ceiling, Kaoru found herself face to face with the one thing that could destory her. Kiyo shoved her shoulders down into the padded mattress and leaned his body over her, seperating her legs with his own and bringing his lips dangerously near her own. Taking whatever precautions she could without causing herself more suffering, Kaoru turned her head away from him and faced the headboard of the bed, closing her eyes vainly, praying that would barricade her destructed spirit from her immaculate and corrupted reality.

"Do you know what I'm going to do to you?"

Sake... she could smell it on his breath.

"Nishawagi-sama... please... for once could you not take your anger out on me?" Kaoru pleaded, trying to get him too caught up in conversation to remember what he had been attempting to do to her.

Kiyo forced himself further onto her body, growling in frustration. "You know better than to mention that name."

"I apologize." Kaoru whined, squeezing her tears inside. "I did not mean to offend you or say something that is not allowed!"

The resounding echo of skin smacking skin was heard, and it died down into the silence that filled the bedroom. It took all of Kaoru's strength not to scream out in pain; her lip was bleeding as she bit into it to keep herself quiet. A burning sensation filled up her cheek, and the red print of Kiyo's fist began to formulate upon her skin. This time he hadn't broken anything... Kaoru could tell that much. His drunk state was defering a lot of his strength, meaning this time around... things would be slightly easier to deal with.

It was never completely a piece of cake. But this time... maybe she wouldn't get hurt as bed.

"You do not speak out of turn. Kaoru... my sweet... how many times do I have to punish you before you learn your lesson?"

"I have learned it."

He pushed his lips forcefully upon her own, drawing her into an unwanted, passionate kiss. "I don't think you have. If you did, then you would not continue to disobey me the way that you do."

Using her legs as a means of defense, Kaoru kicked at Kiyo. Her kick connected, but it held no affect- Kiyo was so blinded and numbed by the alcohol swimming throughout his body that anything she seemed to do had no affect. That allowed her to break through her stubborn streak and make her tears fall; this was useless, and she had known that even before she tried. Nothing she did... absolutely nothing could rescue her from this hell. Her family had signed her off to a life of destruction without realizing it. Was this her punishment for bringing in a vagabond to her home, for hitting Yahiko a little too hard too often? Was this her punishment for making family out of an ex-opium maker and a fighter-for-hire? Did Kami truly hate her that much?

Or was she suffering in turn to help lift the burden of Kenshin's sins?

Kiyo's hands snaked within Kaoru's kimono in the same, sickening manner as each and every other time he'd taken the pleasure of raping her spirit and body. What had made her believe, for even a second, that she could be saved from this, that she would escape? Hope only brought forth a deeper disappointment. As she felt the silk of her clothing pull away from her skin, Kaoru gave in to the same thing that Kiyo wanted from her. She cried out in fear, she cried out in sorrow, and she cried in resignation to his power.

There was nothing she could anymore. He would have her body once again, wrapped around and abused by his own.

* * *

It had been hours; Kenshin had yet to find the room that housed Kaoru. The shinobi from the Oniwabanshu were tailing him with extreme skill, and yet Kenshin still managed to evade their trained eyes and ears; no one was going to stop him from saving Kaoru, and if they got in the way then they would have to suffer consequences. He had come to the Nishawagi home with the goal of not leaving until Kaoru was with him once again. He had suffered too long without her, and she had suffered doubly what he had; Kiyo would be lucky if Kenshin chose not to seek the man out after he took Kaoru back to the dojo she had grown up in.

A light cry caught Kenshin's attention, causing his gaze to fall downward and take in the view of Misao, clothed in a maids outfit, underneath the tree he was stalking prey from. Misao glared up at him and called his name once more, directing with her hands for him to pounce down upon the ground under him. Taking a hold of a branch and leveling himself, Kenshin leaped down and performed with cat-like grace a silent landing. The frustration, worry, and anger he felt were apparent in eyes, yet did not defer Misao in the slightest. She stood her ground and double checked around herself, making sure Kiyo had not thrown any guards out to follow her. When she was positive they were alone, she averted her grim gaze upon Kenshin.

"Take her back."

"That's why I came."

Misao growled. "No, you don't understand. You need to take her back! There was nothing that I could do for her tonight, Aoshi-sama instructed me not to use violence agianst that bastard... and by kami Himura..."

He looked at Misao, anger filling his next words. "What did he do to her?"

The desperation in her expression was enough to explain the deep rooted hatred Misao was holding. Her body was rigid as she fisted her palms together, obviously itching to grab a hold of her kunai and destroy the man on her own. There were tears of frustration flowing from her eyes, surfacing the kind of emotions a shinobi shouldn't place outward.

"Just get her out of there Himura. He's degraded her enough... I can't promise anything to Aoshi-sama anymore. You have to get her out." Misao demanded. "Now, before something worse happens and..."

"I'm going to get her out." Kenshin promised. "But where is she?"

"I'll take you to her Himura... but you have to be quiet. Forget about Kiyo for a minute and focus on Kaoru-chan soley."

Kenshin's response was a crisp nod.

* * *

They moved along the shadows, leaving invisible prints and evidence of their existance and purpose. Moving toward the angel that was trapped in darkened chains, they twisted through the corridors and halls that mocked their purpose, echoing incoherently of the injustice they were infringing upon. Neither companion said a word; they were on a mission to rescue one of their own, something that was more precious than gold and gemstones. Swiftly making their way in secrecy through the territory of the enemy, Kenshin and Misao neared the room that housed Kaoru's beaten and battered body, the one who's spirit and strength long ago shattered. There was a hostile air around the pair as they inched closer, speaking of danger to anyone who dared to hinder their path or stop them from reaching their righteous goal at the end of the tunnel. 

Misao stopped suddenly, standing cautiuosly before the door they needed to enter. She knocked quietly, awaiting a response from Kaoru who was locked within it. The silence and ensued after the knock was unrelenting, causing a deep nervousness amongst Kenshin and Misao alike. Taking they key that only she had permission to carry, Misao unlocked the door and allowed herself and Kenshin entrance to the room. Kaoru was no where within the darkened confides; the bed was untouched, the floor empty and devoid of a human presence. Misao rushed around, thinking of the one place that Kaoru could be hiding. She knew for a fact that she was in that room; she had watched Kiyo toss her in and lock it.

Kenshin walked further into the room, looking around for anything that seemed out of place. It was so neat and orderly... something that reflected a lot of Kaoru's personality and the way she used to keep her dojo. But where would she hide?

... The closet...

Nearly ripping the hinges from the wall, Kenshin drew the closet door open and gazed up the remains of the woman he had fought so hard for.

* * *

Author's Notes: I know, it sucks for the update... but I really did try. 

Love and hugs-

Crystal Renee


	7. Quixotic Quarter

**Author's Note:** The title to the chapter is somewhat confusing. Quixotic means caught up in the romance of noble deeds and the pursuit of unreachable goals; idealistic without regard to practicality or impulsive. Quarter, in the sense I used it, means mercy or clemency, especially when displayed or given to an enemy. Thus quixotic quarter, this would mean impulsive mercy. I thought it sounded cool, okay? Excuse my use of large words! I'm dedicating this chapter to Scarlet Rayne for seeing me important enough to regain contact with!

**Adrenaline Adoration**

_**Chapter 7- Quixotic Quarter**_

Kaoru clung desperately to her legs, pulling them as close to her body as humanly possibly. There were tears trailing down her cheeks, littering the red kimono she wore with blackened splotches where they fell. Her usually vibrant aura was small and dull, shaded with fear and shrinking with sorrow. The paste white color of her skin was frightening; she appeared to be dead already. Short, gasping breaths were the only clue that she was indeed still alive. As she lay there like a limp doll, only one word could come to Kenshin's mind.

Fragile… she looked so frail.

Leaning to the side in defeat, Kaoru started to fall from inside the closet directly into Kenshin's arms. She made a feeble attempt to push him away, mumbling incoherently about Kiyo and how she didn't want him to touch her. His eyes softened and Kenshin clung to her, drawing her close to his chest in a protective, gentle embrace. This new Kaoru was so hauntingly weak, a ghost of her former self. Her movements were pathetic and almost teasing, like she wasn't trying. The way she trembled told of her terrified state; it made Kenshin's heart twist into odd, agonizing angles.

"Kaoru…" Kenshin started, hoping to relieve her fears.

She passed out before he could finish.

Misao had been standing by the doorway, her eyes searching the halls for guards or Kiyo himself. As Kenshin scooped his fallen angel up into his arms and stood, Misao began making rapid movements with her palm, signaling a danger he couldn't decipher. She turned and glared at Kenshin when she realized he hadn't moved yet. Hadn't the urgency of her signal been enough to alert him?

"You need to go! Kiyo's coming!" she hissed. "I can hold him off and then get out on my own. Just go!"

Emotions raged within his head; Kenshin wasn't sure what to do. Kiyo was here and he could dispose of the bastard once and for all, but he also had Kaoru. Could he really take the risk of losing her again because he blindly attempted to fight the madman that had pushed her into her current state? Kenshin knew he couldn't risk her getting hurt now, she was already wounded enough. He had to get out of there before Kiyo could corrupt her again.

He would deal with Kiyo later. Keeping Kaoru saferight thenwas the most important thing. He had given her up so easily before, unknowingly selling her to the devil.

There was no way he could make the same mistake again.

* * *

Darkness covered the dojo. It was well past midnight when Kenshin had finally arrived back home with Kaoru. She still hadn't woken up, which was something that he was partially grateful for; as much as he yearned to assure her that she was safe, he knew he couldn't handle her right now. His blood was boiling. There was a rage inside his heart he could have never imagined; all the times Kenshin had thought he was angry before could have never amounted to the anger that burned within him now. It was demonic. 

When he had run into Kaoru on the Tokyo streets and seen how submissive she was, worry had begun to spread throughout him. He had known something was wrong, but never had he imagined it would be this rancid. The rotten life he had basically abandoned Kaoru to had corrupted her; every square inch of her body and being had been marred with insidious memories that he could never hope to cleanse her of. This was something she would have to live with for the rest of her life.

Never had he blamed himself so much for something… he had vowed to protect her, and he had failed. Kenshin knew he never should have given Kaoru up to Kiyo; that was the biggest mistake he had ever made. His senses never failed him before, so why didn't he state his unwavering distrust of the man in the first place? If anything, he should have done it for her; the sadness that was in her expression before she left had told her story. He should have forgotten that speaking his mind on Kiyo woudl have benefitted him and just focused on what Kaoru had wanted to begin with; her tears told her truth, even though she went agaisnt it just as he had.

She never wanted this to begin with, andKenshin had done absolutely nothing toprotect her from the bad choice they had both made.

He had just sat back in his own despair and ignored the fact that he could have saved her from this long ago. It didn't have to come to him sneaking into the Nishawagi home and stealing her back. If he had only stepped up and said something, spoke of his disapproval and stated his reasons, none of this would have happened.

Kaoru would still be smiling.

Kenshin wasn't sure who to be angry with anymore; himself or Kiyo. Rightfully, Kiyo had done the wrongdoing, but Kenshin knew he could have halted it before it ever began. There was never a time he had second guessed his actions or reasons, but now he wasn't sure he could ever trust himself. If he could make such small errors that could lead to something this horrendous, what other kinds of damage could he do? Hadn't he already done enough damage in his youth? It didn't make sense that all his mistakes had toreciprocate and hurt Kaoru. His prescene was slowly killing her in an indirect manner, and he knew it.

Leaving Kaoru now was out of the question, though. Sanosuke and Yahiko were no where near to help her now; Kenshin wasn't even sure he would entrust her safety to them in the first place. She had become so brittle and frail now; he was afraid their rough and tumble ways would unknowingly break her.

Cradling her to him gently, Kenshin closed and locked the dojo gate and then headed inside, traveling down the comforting familiarity of its protective walls. There was no sound as he padded across the unused dojo and toward the connecting shoji door; he moved like the shadow he was in the past, his eyes and senses alert to any oncoming threat. This was the only place Kenshin could truly feel secure, but even here he knew there was danger. It could be lurking beyond the door he was opening, or in the room he was headed toward.

Following the hall to Kaoru's old room, Kenshin slid the door open again and blinked a few times until he could adjust to the dark and spot her old futon. Stepping over and kicking the bedding until it fell into a crisp, flat placement upon the floor, Kenshin lowered Kaoru down onto the mattress. After adjusting her position and setting her head gently upon the headrest, he reached for a small blanket and set it overtop of her.

She was sleeping now. She was safe.

There was no reason for him to hesitate.

His palm lay upon her forehead, gently pushing her bangs away from the pale shades of her face, exposing her to his view. Even with everything he went through to find her, part ofKenshin didn't believe she was there. Something wasn't right… this wasn't Kaoru. It was her body, but not her. There was a light sadness in his eyes as he knelt beside her, his hand settled gently upon the crown of her head. It was ironic how he had her here and yet managed to truly leave her with Kiyo anyway, simply because he had been too late.

She was there with him, but it was just the shell, her body. Kaoru's vivacity, her lively personality… her spark, had died in that house, and remained there to rot away. That was something Kenshin knew he could never bring back to her. She had fought too long on her own and lost the war; all he could do now was hope he could build her back up to a livable state.

Rape… Kiyo had been raping her. The truth of that fact had been proven to him that night; there was not much else that could bring Kaoru down to the pathetic state he saw her in when he opened that closet. Even if she was scared, there was no way she would cower and hide like that. Kiyo had slowly broken her down, piece of by piece, tearing her life from her and storing it away where she could never grasp it again. It was torture Kenshin could only envision, and the anger it rooted in him made his free hand fist together.

Why did have to be her?

Kenshin stood, shutting the door to Kaoru's room. All those nights he had spent outside her door, protecting her from the shadows, were now gone. He was staying with her that night; he wanted her within his sights. Nothing was going to get to her unless they were planning on dealing with him first.

Stopping suddenly, Kenshin turned his angry gaze toward the closet. He wasn't alone, but the aura was familiar and held no hostility. He calmed a small amount; he had been expecting this guest from the beginning.

"Aoshi, come out."

The door slid open a little, and Aoshi slithered out, his coat the only thing making noise as he pushed onward to a corner where he had full advantage of sight and disguise. Kenshin kept his eyes directly on him; Aoshi was by no means a threat, but he was also not there for joyful chit chat. There were certain expressions that even Aoshi couldn't keep from his face, and serious was definitely one of them.

"You didn't listen to me. I told you the Oniwabanshu would be taking her out of the home in a week."

"She didn't have a week." Kenshin growled. "One more week and she would have been dead."

Aoshi made no attempt to show that the comment had truth. "I also told you Misao was with her. She knows how to do her job."

"I don't care." Kenshin stated, the final tone in his voice echoing off the walls.

"That was a fool move, Battousai." He continued. "I think it is in your best interests to let us keep watch on you. Kiyo cancelled his business trip and sent out search parties for Kaoru."

"Misao didn't get out without injury, did she?" Kenshin guessed, reading the filtering emotions that rushed through Aoshi's eyes.

"Her state is not of importance now." He responded, the attempt at keeping his voice emotionless very apparent. "I'm not here to discuss Misao."

"I wasn't going to just fly in." Kenshin told him. "Misao told me to take Kaoru out."

There was a moment of surprise in Aoshi's expression; obviously Misao had left that small detail out when she reported back to him. Aoshi crossed his arms and remained silenced, thinking over what to do next. He peered down at Kaoru momentarily, taking in all he could from her appearance andthe spike in Kenshin's ki when he had glanced at her. The protective nature within Kenshin had been filtered into a dangerous mixture, and Aoshi could sense that; he wasn't separated into two personas any longer. Battousai and rurouni were no long split parts of Kenshin; they had melded into one.

"You will kill for her now. There is no hesitation in you any longer."

Kenshin didn't respond.

"I thought as much." Aoshi answered, pushing himself off the wall using his shoulders. "We will keep watch on Kiyo and alert you to any threat. Be gentle with her, Battousai."

Aoshi stepped from the room, disappearing into the darkness of the dojo halls. Silence suffocated the room as Kenshin shut the door one more time, pivoting on his heel to look back at the girl on the futon. She lay there motionless, breathing peacefully in a restless sleep. So many ironies in one small, insignificant act… that was ironic and haunting in itself.

Kenshin's attention was diverted to a glare at the foot of Kaoru's futon, sticking defiantly from underneath her kimono where it had been hiding. He neared her slowly and knelt beside her, pulling the offending object away and inspecting it. Had she been hiding this inside her kimono? Whatit was highly surprised him; what use would she have for something like this?

It was a small knife, not large enough to be considered of much use. The blood that was encrusted around the tip scared him; where had it come from? Kenshin leaned back against the wall and propped his sword up against his shoulder as he inspected the small blade in his grasp. It was well built for something that served little to no purpose, and it even appeared custom made. Kiyo's name was encrested into the handle, symbolizing his ownership.

Anger bubbled in Kenshin's heart again.

Did Kiyo use this to hurt her? That would explain the blood, and why it had still been with her; it was possible she had fought it out of his grasp and then hid in the closet, hiding the knife with her to keep it from him. Kenshin had half the heart to pull her blanket back and check Kaoru for injuries, but he knew better. He hadn't spotted any intense amounts of blood, and he didn't want her waking up feeling he had violated her just the same as Kiyo.

That would have to wait until Kaoru woke up.

Kenshin settled back against the wall, pushing himself into the half sleep of a hitokiri, where he could be alert to danger and still resting. He would spend his nights like this until he felt Kaoru was safe; he was not going to leave her alone or abandon her again.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Yes. A short little chapter, but it's an update I've been hoping to get up for some time. For any readers of my 'Breaking Through' story, that may not be updated again for quite some time. I started it on my other computer, where it was on Powerpoint… and that computer is now long gone, so I'll have to go through all the chapters to re-read and start up again, and I may not start that until I finish this story and a few of my other ones. I apologize. 

Love you all!

Crystal Renee


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